No weak links in The Chain of BBC F1

Some BBC sports presenters get quite a lot of stick for their work and rightly so. Those on the Match of the Day sofa have become a pastiche of themselves, offering very little in the way of genuine insight while certain rugby union commentators have displayed some disgraceful bias in the recent Six Nations (step forward Moore and Davies).

So it is a relief that Auntie can call on the various talents of Jake Humphreys, Eddie Jordan and David Coulthard to front their Formula 1 coverage. They comfortably manage to combine ladishness with genuine knowledge and experience of the sport (less so Humphreys than his perma-tanned colleagues). The homoeroticism that exists between Jordan and Coulthard is riveting to watch, which is a blessing when you get a race like the one we had in Bahrain a fortnight back. They even provided us with a little skit at the start of Sunday's Australian Grand Prix, joking about how dull Bahrain had been but they thought that this could be the week where things "took off". We then cut to Jordan and Humphreys being launched into the air in one of those bungee fairground contraptions. Genius! Thankfully, their ideas came to fruition and we had a classic race, with the rule changes actually working in providing more overtaking.

When you add in the roving reporter Ted Kravitz, the gorgeous Lee McKenzie (who always seems to get an interview with even the most disappointed of drivers, wonder why?) and the unflappable Martin Brundle and you have a crack team that actually does its sport justice.

As for the racing itself, Jenson Button was not confidently backed by many to retain his title. But with no refuelling necessitating the conservation of fuel and tyres, could his oft-cited "smooth driving style" equip him to do the job?
RM

The County Scene - Week 1: Durham in the desert

Here begins a weekly blog on the English county cricket circuit.

The much-maligned county season has begun in the traditional manner but in an unfamiliar environment. It's the MCC vs Champions match, usually played at Lord's but this time there's a difference. The match is being played in Abu Dhabi in a day/night environment, the first first-class match to do so. A pink ball is also being trialled, with the intention that it is visible under floodlights but doesn't discolour like the white ball in one-day games, so that it can last the full 80 overs. This could be a step in the right direction for Test cricket, as the night time element makes the game more accessible for those who have a job to attend! Fingers crossed that this trial is successful.

As I write, Durham have won the toss and batted and are 31/0. Steve Harmison plays and will be looking to prove a point to the England selectors who snubbed him in the winter, when an out-and-out pace bowler was what they really needed. The MCC are not as strong as they have been in previous years, mainly because a couple of players toured Bangladesh with the national squad and so have been rested. They are captained by Alex Gidman of Gloucestershire, with international experience from the likes of Mark Ramprakash, James Foster and Chris Tremlett

The winter was reasonably busy, simmering under as is standard for the county scene! Matthew Hoggard was cruelly cut by Yorkshire, only to be given the captain by Leicestershire - how will he marshall a young bunch led by the PCA Young Cricketer of the Year James Taylor? Monty Panesar, looking to rediscover his mojo, moved down to Sussex, former home of the great Mushtaq Ahmed. Another former resident at Hove, Chris Adams, has slowly been building a new side in his role of director of cricket at Surrey - Steve Davies, Gareth Batty and Rory Hamilton-Brown have all been lured to the Oval. They will be wanting to put a couple of disappointing years behind them and start a new era.

The new season is upon us! I for one cannot wait!
RM

Next week: Reports from the match in Abu Dhabi and the opening university games of the season. Also a preview of the Championship, including my traditionally woeful predictions.

World Cup Previews: South Africa

Start with the hosts. It's the normal proceedure. In South Africa's case it is also convenient, as there are great doubts as to whether Bafana Bafana's chances will actually get a mention at any point beyond the opening game.

South Africa suffered greatly in recent years. While apartheid was undoubtedly a factor, I am not here to discuss things in great socio-political detail. Rather, South Africa retained a sense of regality, maintaining the belief that they were amongst the continent's elite in spite of strong evidence to the contrary in every African Cup of Nations since 2000. South Africans felt that they were a powerhouse by virtue of the fact that they had won the 1996 tournament, and reached beyond the quarter finals in 1998 and 2000; in basic terms, they had won something, no-one else nearby had, and so they were a dominant local force. Completely ignored was the fact that local rivals include Mozambique, Lesotho and Namibia.

This mindset ensured that South Africa's potential talent was never properly marshalled. The country seemed content with its exported players; indeed, they remain a talented group. The home-grown aspect, those players left behind, was though, completely neglected.

When the Rainbow Nation was awarded the World Cup, people seemed to be more keen on soul-searching. What they found was a nation desperately unable to meet its unfounded lofty expectations. People were not so keen to actually do something about the problems they found.

So to the present. The experienced Carlos Alberto Parriera has returned as coach after a farcical disagreement between the Federation and previous Brazilian tactician Joel Santana, a man unqualified to hold down the job to begin with. Santana presided over a run of 8 losses in 9, which led to his sacking, and failed utterly to show meaningful progress towards being able to achieve anything of significance at their own World Cup.

Certainly, Parriera cannot be deemed a knight in shining armour, as his previous tenure in late 2007 was little better. However, he remains a far superior and astute manager than any other realistic candidate for the job.
Parriera has been accused of negative, old fashioned tactics, indeed this ousted him from the Brazil job. Given the squad he now has to work with though, these tactics are probably of benefit.

South Africa will operate with a tight 4-4-2 system, utilising the two central midfielders mainly to apply defensive pressure. The defence lacks in pace, and plays deep and tight; in doing so, they are a reasonably solid team dealing with the high ball- 6'6" Matt Booth (pictured left) in particular.

The midfield, at the end of the day, is relying on such salutory talents as Aaron Mokoena, Elerio Van Heerden and Lance Davids. At least in Stephen Pienaar, Bernard Parker and Bryce Moon, some youngish talent exists. Sorely lacking though, is a goal threat of any real distinction, suitable backup cover in any position, reliable goalkeeping and creative outlets (Siphiwe Tshabalala is talented, but frail and too tiny to take a game by the scruff of its neck).

I always feel that the effect of being a host will come into play at every tournament. Even if, such as Austria, the nation fails to reach the knockout stages, they will at least do well enough to avoid disgrace. Will South Africa be an exception? No, not in my book. I just cannot see a group of players with a competent manager and playing for their nation allowing themselves to be humiliated.

And I feel that their group oppostion, Mexico, Uruguay and France are not in any real position to go out and humiliate South Africa anyway. The France game will be lost, and it will be lost in the dull, generally lifeless manner that France tend to deliver to international competitions. Uruguay's spoiling style could pose a problem, but equally they are an easy team to play football against provided one grasps the game quickly, sets the pace to a high level and keeps it there. Mexico should be too strong in a footballing sense to let the South Africans beat them using an offensive minded gameplan; a tighter, one goal to win it style of game could get South Africa a result.

At the end of the day, South Africa remain on paper one of the weakest host nations in memory, and I do not feel they will progress from the group stages. But, at least, I feel they will not disgrace themselves as many predict, and may even be able to set themselves up for progression in the competion.

If they were a medical condition - HIV/AIDS. Woah there, don't go rushing to complain about un-PC and all that. We are merely talking about the hosts being compromised by lack of quality, much as a sufferer of HIV are immunosuppressed - host compromised, get it?

GM

Lack of respect in football trickles from the top down

I have been in the privileged position of being a season ticket holder at a winning club this year (it hasn't always been the case, but then we haven't always had to play in Divison 3). As such, you would expect an air of content around the place. No such thing. Despite only dropping 5 points at home all year, I have yet to attend a home game where the referee and his assistants are not branded a "prick" or a "disgrace". I mean what do these people expect? There is nothing tempting for a Pierluigi Collina-type figure in Forfar vs Albion. You cannot hope for the very best officials for mostly part-time players. And most of the time these "pricks" actually get it right, but you don't hear the same fans congratulating the officials on their excellent, well-thought out decision do you?

I have come to the conclusion that it all comes down to frustration with your own team's performance, giving a need to qualify this inadequacy by blaming it on the referee. This is a culture that directly stems from the highest levels - Sir Alex Ferguson having a pop at Alan Wiley's fitness levels to "protect his players" being a prime example. Just come out and say it Alex - your guys just were not good enough on the day and did not execute their best-laid plans. End of! Ditto the Steve Bruces and Neil Warnocks of this world, who never seem to be able to get off the cases of referees. Seeing the very best in the game indulging in these activities sets a bad example to lesser mortals such as Livingston fans!

Respect is a difficult thing to gain in sport, when so much can be riding on one big moment. However, some sports have found it easier than others. The other day in an IPL match, Adam Gilchrist, captain of the Deccan Chargers, was heard on the stump microphone joking with umpire Billy Bowden about the fact that he had incorrectly chosen not to refer a stumping. Gilchrist is an old hand and knows the line - it's all very well in the shortest form but questioning the umpire in a Test match would lose you a good portion of your match fee. Gilchrist and Bowden had earned each other's respect over a long period of time, so this incident could be taken in the manner in which it was intended. Just today, I was umpiring in a friendly cricket tournament - some dodgy decisions given (not on my watch I can assure you), but the game was played in the right spirit (with the exception of one fat twat who insisted on picking fault with everything) and all players respected the umpires decision. Respect at the highest level breeds respect at all levels

Footballers are harder to control because of the fast pace of the game and the fact that any fine would come of no consequence to those at the highest level. Banning would be seen in some quarters as too harsh. But please, for my own sanity, can we at least acknowledge that referees do a hard job and most of them actually do a good job - let's keep unnecessary grievances under wraps. Especially when 14 points clear at the top!

Technology is just one aspect where football could learn from other sports
RM

McNabb rumours hint at a rushing future for Eagles

Rumours have been bouncing around the NFL recently that the Philadelphia Eagles' veteran QB Donovan McNabb may soon be on the move. The Eagles have 3 QBs on their roster, all of whom have legitimate claims to a starting role - Kevin Kolb impressed with his first two starts last season and is seen as the man for the future, whereas Michael Vick, "dogged" by disciplinary problems, featured only minimally in the Eagles offense last season. 1 of these 3 has to go.

For my money, Vick has to be the man. He has made it plain that he wishes to start and he will not get that Lincoln Financial. Yes, he can be used sparingly in wildcat plays and he can go long but really it's not either in his or the Eagles' best interests. McNabb can pass on his 11 seasons of wisdom to Kolb, who can take over the reins in a couple of years' time.

But what if McNabb is to go? I believe this changes the whole outlook of the Eagles' offense. Kolb will be the starter, but he cannot realistically be relied upon to make the big plays that McNabb regularly did. Far better to rely on a running game, boosted by the presence of Vick as the backup. With LeSean McCoy, Pro-Bowler Leonard Weaver and new recruit RB from New Orleans Mike Bell, the Eagles finally have a wealth of options in the backfield - in spite of releasing veteran HB Brian Westbrook. My colleague disagrees with this view, stating that the Eagles "have always been a passing team" but I can't help feeling that it could be the start of a new era for Andy Reid and his young offense.

So far, the teams linked with McNabb have been falling over each other to deny the rumours. He'll be gone by Monday.
RM

Coming Soon on Beyond the Cliche

- Graeme's World Cup preview gets into full swing as the feast of football in South Africa draws ever closer

- Ryan will start a weekly blog featuring all the goings on in county cricket - starting next week with the MCC vs Durham game, where day/night first class matches will be trialled

- We will bring you all the news from the upcoming 75th NFL Draft

- The football league season draws to a close, with Livingston looking to have sealed their promotion and Dumbarton pushing for a late playoff surge, we give you a taste of the joy and anguish that goes with being a lower league supporter!

The IPL Circus - pushing advertising to the DLF maximum

First of all , let me say that Twenty20 cricket is here to stay and deservedly so. It has captured the imagination of a group of people previously uninterested in cricket or those who had grown weary of endless drawn test matches on subcontinental featherbeds. Neither do I have a problem with the actual cricket being played in the IPL - for the most part the matches have been tight and tense, with the big name players showing their worth, whilst some lesser known local players make a name for themselves to a wider audience (more on this later)

What I cannot stand is the commentary - my underlying suspicion is that there are a couple of surly men in dark suits holding Ravi Shastri, Danny Morrision et al at gunpoint, ensuring that they mention their quota of DLF Maximums whenever a 6 is hit, or declaring every minor turning point as a "Citi Moment of Success".

This year has seen the addition of strategic timeouts, a sound idea in concept. Sorry, that's meant to be the Maximobile Strategic Timeout, usually taken after a Karbon Kamaal Catch in the outfield. Advertising hoardings are enough Mr Modi, so tell your hyperbolic commentators to call the game as it is and stop pandering to the sponsors.

Anyway, on a happier note, it has been heartening to see proper cricketers dominating the early stages of this tournamet. Kallis, Vaas and the Little Master himself have been the leading lights, showing the way to the like of Saurabh Tiwary, David Warner and Albie Morkel - the big hitters with the big bucks. Long may the veterans continue!

RM

Player of the Six Nations Award

Why are some tries worth more or less than others? Well, refer to Tommy Bowe. He managed to translate the 3 tries he scored over the course of the Six Nations into the Player of the Tournament award, given out today, largely I assume because of those tries. I argue, though, that scores are actually worth less than their face value.

Bowe, for all his clinical finishing, is no more deserving of this award than Aurelian Rougerie of France who, if you don't know, put in one massive hit in the opening minute of the opening game, put in a second one 10 minutes later and injured himself doing it, ruling himself out of the tournament. How so?

Rougerie made two very good, memorable plays that ultimately contributed far less to the outcome than the hype at the time would suggest. Enter Bowe.

Bowe scored twice in the England game, and once against Scotland. He was largely anonymous against the Italians, and contributed little in the victory over Wales. The France game was his low point, in which he was completely out of the races. The overall poor performance of the team factors in here, but that works both ways.

Bowe's two tries against England were both good bits of individual skill. But one came as a result of an injured Wilkinson failing to cover the channel at the rear of a lineout, and Haskell failing utterly to make a tackle. For the other try, there were two other Irish players, one of which was the excellent David Wallace I believe, outside of him waiting to score if Bowe didn't. We can say that, reasonably, Bowe had little real impact in the actual winning of the game. The overall team performance won the Irish that game (i.e. the forwards' effort).

Against Scotland, Bowe scored a good try, shrugging off a weak Sean Lamont tackle. Other than that, he completely failed to best Max Evans, his opposite, in any phase of the game to any real degree, in spite of his size advantage.

A player of the tournament needs to contribute much to a teams victory, and he needs to be one of their best performers should they lose. At the centre of everything champions France did right was the Basque hardman Imanol Harinordaquay, and the not so hard Morgan Parra. Others have claims to be that important to their team; I would name Stephen Jones, Stephen Ferris, Clement Poitrenaud, Johnnie Beattie (perhaps all the Killer B's of Brown and Barclay too) and Alessandro Zanni as being up there.

At the end of the day, France dominated all but the England game, and thus their best performers are inherently more worthy POT6N winners than the Irish flyer.

GM

A preliminary look ahead to the World Cup

Summer can't come soon enough, both for the obvious footballing reasons and for the slender hope that the weather may, just may, not be the meteorological equivalent of standing in a queue at the bank to deposit what little money you have spare to pay for the most menial of bills. Metaphor exhausted.

Anyway, the upcoming weeks will be filled with opinionated so and so's giving their views on what's to come. I believe that the idiotic, bloke-ish ideas of Chris Kamara et al really need to be offset by some genuinely insightful and/or intelligent comments. Preferably without bias (I can say with all honesty that I don't wish for England to lose. They don't need my ill wishes to knock themselves out of a tournament).

I'll give some analysis of what teams are up on form, who's being overrated by the mass pundits, and perhaps some tactical stuff; who matches up against who well. I do play some football myself, and as a keeper my comments will probably centre around criticising defences.

More to come when I am inclined to write it. First up I think will be a look at the hopefuls of the African stage. It's certainly one of the more colourful, varied and interesting areas, and in general I'll try to focus on some less well-known data and players.

GM

Mowbray Out

St Mirren 4 Celtic 0

For all you Rangers fans out there (and quite frankly, I do not exist to keep you entertained, far from it), that is St Mirren 4 Celtic 0

As if lagging 10 points off the lead at this stage of the season having tried and failed to play attractive football (which is impossible with a face like that) wasn't bad enough, Tony Mowbray plumbed new depths at the imaginatively named New St Mirren Park (which we will call Love Street from hereon in, although I will do a Redgrave and say that I will take a gun to my head if I mention St Mirren again here).

It's nice to see that the board has appointed a man to the job who really commands respect amongst fans of Scottish football - welcome to the hotseat Neil Lennon. The petition to put Fernando Ricksen in charge at Ibrox starts here.

In all honesty, I couldn't really give a monkey's about SPL matters - my boys are 11 points clear in Div 3 and the cigars have pretty much already been lit. It's West Lothian though, so I doubt it'll be Cuban.

RM

Welcome to Beyond the Cliche

Hi! I'm Ryan Miller - I'm a 20 year-old student in Edinburgh with a hideous lack of prioritisation in my life - studying or blogging about sport? I think I'll blog about sport! This is Beyond the Cliche, where my colleague and I will give our views on what we feel are the big issues in sport right now. My special interests are football, cricket and rugby union but I can pretty much give an informed view on anything! Here are the teams I support:
Football: Livingston FC and Scotland
Cricket: Somerset Sabres and England (Scotland's team is shite/pretty much non-existent)
Rugby: Edinburgh and Scotland
NFL: Philadelphia Eagles

That's about it from me for now.
RM

So that makes me the colleague Ryan mentioned. He has posted his bio first and covered all the important details, pretty much making my bit redundant. Anyway, I'm Graeme, a student who stricly adheres to the traditional student lifestyle of partying, sleeping and playing rugby. Gifted with a great memory, I have chosen to devote it almost entirely to knowing things about sports. Given a student loan, I have chosen to spend it on Sky Sports. As Ryan said, it's all about priorities.

Anyone I support tends to display a chronic lack of achievement:

Football: Dumbarton FC, Inter Milan and Scotland, but will watch anything. And do.
Rugby: Edinburgh and Scotland
American Football: Washington Redskins
Basketball: New York Knicks and Olkahoma City Thunder, mainly for Kevin Durant
Baseball: The New York Mess. Sorry, I mean Mets
Boxing: Anyone above Welterweight. I'm a big bloke, I like my boxers to be as well.

Plus I'll watch the Olympics, the tennis Grand Slam's, the Tour de France and pretty much anything else I can. If two Filipino children start kicking a coconut around, I'll quickly start tuning in.

That'll do.

GM