Ryan's Top 5
5. Everybody involved in the Vikings at Eagles game. This is for entirely non-sporting reasons. It's not often I get to spout off about issues outwith the sporting world, so this seemed like an opportunity. This game was initially postponed because of a blizzard as part of the horrendous weather in the NE coast of America. When was it reschduled? For two days later. Now why is it that we cannot deal with a bit of climate change at an typically cold time of the year when our cousins over the pond are dealing with much worse successfully? A small flurry in the UK and the whole country comes to a standstill. The US get on with it the best they can. Incidentally, the Vikings ran out 24-14 winners, meaning the Eagles will miss out on a bye in the playoffs.
4. Tim Tebow - 16/29, 308 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT; 10 carries, 27 yards, 1 TD. If you're going to get your first win as a starting QB, it's great to be facing the Texans awful banged-up defense. Particularly when your team has no running game to speak of. The first-round pick out of Florida came up big in the 4th quarter of the Broncos 24-23 win, putting doubts over his accuracy and throwing action to bed and then demonstrating what we already knew about his ability to scramble out of the pocket. He could still be big in this league...
3. Johnny Knox - 4 catches, 92 yards, 2 TD's. To my mind, the forgotten man in a very successful Chicago Bears side. All the talk is of Jay Cutler's breakout year, Devin Hester and Matt Forte as the lynchpins of the offense and a hard-hitting defense led by Julius Peppers and Brian Urlacher. But boy, can Knox make plays, reeling in 2 fantastic touchdown catches in a 38-34 win over the Jets. To my mind, Cutler isn't nearly consistent enough to win a Superbowl right now, but he has all the weapons at his disposal to have a pretty good tilt.
2. Matt Cassel - 24/34, 314 yards, 3 TD's. I cringed when I looked back at my AFC West preview from August. Quotes such as "Kansas City Chiefs - still rubbish" and "Eric Berry will make plays, whilst the offense will not" stick out. Although Berry did run in a pick six in a 34-14 win over the Titans. Which took the Chiefs to the playoffs as AFC West champions. Cassel in particular took some stick back in August but has been so accurate and error-free all season, despite playing it safe early on but flourishing into a quality man to have under centre. I would like to take this opportunity to apologise to him and his team and refuse to write them off come the postseason!
1. Jeff Charleston - 1 tackle, 1 FF. Awarded on behalf of the entire Saints defense, for a big hit on Michael Turner on the 1 yard line, turning the ball over, leading to a 17-14 victory over the high-flying Falcons. It appears they are fallible in the Georgia Dome after all - a good thing for all teams in the NFC as they look a good bet to wrap up homefield advantage next week. As for the Saints, Drew Brees didn't have his best game, but the defense kept Matt Ryan quiet and did just enough to ensure the champions would return to the playoffs for another shot at glory.
Wednesday 29 December 2010
Friday 24 December 2010
How to beat the Big Freeze
I have been informed by my esteemed colleague that we have a wider readership than I had expected. Sadly, most of these readers reside in Scotland, so my increasing coverage of cricket has pretty much fallen on deaf ears. That said, I'm sure BtC is reaching some obscure readers in India, although I am yet to receive my Fatwa in the post for saying I don't like their cricket team. However, I refuse to take responsibility for the current weather and really have nothing else but cricket to write about. But I now realise I have a new group of readers to satisfy - so here is a cricket-free guide to getting your sporting fix when all around you reads P-P:
1. Become an Alloa Athletic fan - admittedly unless you live in Alloa, transport to and from Recreation Park could be an issue right now. And, even by Scottish Division Two standards, they are a decidely average side (although a treat for a Dumbarton fan). But they have a plastic pitch and as such have seen more action than most in the snow and ice. Livi visit on Boxing Day, the only fixture still left in Div 2, and this very much excites me!
2. Practise a sport we're actually good at - the streets of Edinburgh have been like sheets of ice, with nothing going up or down them. Why are we working so hard to clear them, when all we need to do is to get our brooms out and create some outdoor curling rinks! If we all get enough practise in, we can take Sochi by storm in 2014. And also impress rather attractive Scottish skip Eve Muirhead (see picture) with our phenomenal skills, learned on the mean streets!
1. Become an Alloa Athletic fan - admittedly unless you live in Alloa, transport to and from Recreation Park could be an issue right now. And, even by Scottish Division Two standards, they are a decidely average side (although a treat for a Dumbarton fan). But they have a plastic pitch and as such have seen more action than most in the snow and ice. Livi visit on Boxing Day, the only fixture still left in Div 2, and this very much excites me!
2. Practise a sport we're actually good at - the streets of Edinburgh have been like sheets of ice, with nothing going up or down them. Why are we working so hard to clear them, when all we need to do is to get our brooms out and create some outdoor curling rinks! If we all get enough practise in, we can take Sochi by storm in 2014. And also impress rather attractive Scottish skip Eve Muirhead (see picture) with our phenomenal skills, learned on the mean streets!
3. Be prepared for when the football restarts - we've all been there. Walking along so carefully when all of a sudden your legs go from underneath you and you wind up with a sorer arse than an Irish chorister. But we can put the lack of grip to our advantage. Such is modern football, that when we do finally get to put our Saturday afternoons to good use again, we will have perfected falling over to such a degree that any referee in the business will be conned by simulation. If you can't beat them...!
4. Buy an American football - they only cost a tenner in JJB after all. And I'm not talking about the nancy teams who have a domed roof. I'm talking about the Bears and the Patriots and the Packers, who like to play their football outside all winter long in blizzard conditions. In homage to them, let us don our balaclavas and breed the next generation of Tom Bradys down at the local park, whilst the "tough" rugby types (they're all just posh kids really aren't they?) stay indoors for that extra helping of turkey!
5. The indoor tennis court - I refuse to classify darts or snooker as sports, merely something to accompany that well-earned pint after fulfilling your sporting needs this winter. Also, squash and badminton don't really receive enough attention to be worth pursuing when everything else is frozen over. But tennis... it's not that bad really. So while the pros are taking a break from the long tour season, dust off your rackets and get working on that backhand!
6. Give yourself something to look forward to - I know these "experience gifts" are meant to be for other people. But face it, these are desperate times and we all have a little disposable income around this time of year. So, if you insist upon writing the festive season off for sport, buy yourself a track day, for that adrenaline rush when things finally clear up. If you're really that sad, you can fill in the little gift tag to yourself as well!
7. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5m6yLEy4h4. Quintessential winter sport at its most violent. Perfect!
8. ESPN Classic - for all those of you out there who don't enjoy Doctor Who, The Royle Family or Eastenders specials. Although not everyone is subscribed to this clearly inferior Sky Sports wannabe channel, it does have its upside. Namely the opportunity to watch classic sporting encounters from a whole range of sports in the comfort of your own living room, while the snow falls outside. Encounters in an age where men were real men and got on with their jobs in the bad weather, as the rest of us are expected to do!
9. Use the opportunity to brush up on your knowledge - this one is pretty much specifically aimed at Graeme. Get hold of some Rothman's yearbooks or fire up Wikipedia and broaden your sporting horizons, so next time you go to a game, you can wow your fellow spectators with your knowledge of Glen Loovens' exact height and weight. Who wouldn't be impressed?
10. Learn to like cricket dammit - OK so maybe I lied about this guide being completely cricket-free, much like most Indian restuarants do about the nut content of their food. Each to their own I guess. Merry Christmas to you all!
RM
Wednesday 22 December 2010
Like A Mad Octopus: The State Of Scottish Rugby This Month
Enough with the weather! All this snow and ice has forced us to read about nothing but cricket for too long (seriously, does it ever end? All of our summer, then all of their summer!).
I delayed writing this edition a bit so that I could properly sum up all of the goings on of late; the Magners League, the Heineken Cup group stages and of course the Autumn Internationals. There are some things that are best glossed over and some that deserve glorious praise, so let's get started!
The Club Scene
Edinburgh (7th in Magners League, 3rd in Pool 1). Let the glossing over begin! Actually, Edinburgh haven't been all that bad of late. They are one position higher in the league and cup than they were when we left them before the International break. Sadly, 3rd in the Heineken Cup group is not enough to qualify for the knockout stages, and the 7 points that they do have will probably not be enough to reach the Amlin Challenge Cup knockout stages (rugby's UEFA Cup setup). The close 24-22 win against Castres at an empty Murrayfield (safety concerns for once, not just apathy!) was nice, and the loss in France was pretty much inevitable. On the whole, I wouldn't be that disappointed with the Burgh's European performance this year. It's well known that the Scottish sides have no cash, but to be drawn with moneybags like Northampton and Cardiff was a bit unlucky.
The plus point of being out of European action is that Edinburgh can concentrate on the Magners League and beat up on weakened bigger sides, much like they did last year. They are, after all, only 5 points off of a playoff spot and I would expect them to be very close to getting one at the end of the season. Sadly though, when Edinburgh are having to play their backups as well the tables are well and truly turned. Quite simply, they do not have any strength in depth. The Scottish internationals in the side bring a lot to the table, and when they are with the national side the club suffers greatly. Beating Connacht and Treviso in Edinburgh is hardly ticker tape parade material, and getting pounded 33-16 away to Ospreys second XV is more telling.
Glasgow (10th in the league. 3rd in Pool 6). Once again, when the internationals are away the team turns crap. Glasgow are just not good enough to compete with decent teams unless they can field their absolute strongest team. Hindered by postponements, they struggled to keep any form over the past month. As a result, they lost badly to Toulouse both home and away. While the European champs were obviously the favourites, it was the manner of the defeats that was concerning. I was at the home game at Firhill and they were frankly abominable. Unable to hold a basic defensive line or to tackle, they were spared only by Toulouse's indifference.
Even more embarassingly, Glasgow were pounded in the Magners League. Cardiff beat them 38-6, but at least they did beat Aironi 33-8. The Scottish teams just do not have any significant depth of squad. Without better role players, they will never progress in Europe and will also continue to lose games that they should not and make other losses worse than they should be. Welsh rugby has double the number of teams, and Wales has a smaller population than Scotland. Yet Welsh sides have large squads filled with combative players who, when given the chance to start, perfom to a far higher level than Glasgow or Edinburgh can in similar situations.
These next few games need to be won before the Six Nations once again deprives the clubs of their key players.
The National Side
Well, I predicted all three games correctly so well done me. Might as well list the scores:
Scotland 3 (Penalty: Parks)
New Zealand 49 (Tries: Gear 2, Muliaina 2, Carter, Smith, Ellis. Con: Carter 5, Donald 2)
New Zealand 49 (Tries: Gear 2, Muliaina 2, Carter, Smith, Ellis. Con: Carter 5, Donald 2)
Scotland 21 (Penalties: Parks 6. Drops: Parks)
South Africa 17 (Tries: Alberts. Penalties: M Steyn 4)
Scotland 19 (Tries: Walker. Con: Parks. Penalties: Parks 2, Jackson. Drops: Parks)
Samoa 16 (Tries: Fotuali'i. Con: P Williams. Penalties: P Williams 3)
The obvious game to gloss over is the New Zealand debacle but as I am a man and after a month can now think about the result without curling up in a ball and sobbing uncontrollably, I will look over it.
Firstly, though it is pretty obviously reflected in the score, New Zealand were infinately superior to the Scots. There was not one area of play that we were close to matching the All Blacks at. The fact that it was our first match of the Autumn and we had had no warm up was evident, but the difference in skill was even more apparent. The Scots did not defend the New Zealanders at all effectively, staying too straight in their line and being too passive. We did not drift effectively, being over-committed to matching up 2 on 1 and neglecting the narrow channels. For two of the tries, we were simply not aggressive enough around the fringes and were beaten down the narrowside wing, even though there were tacklers there to intervene. This is simply inexcusable at any level.
I won't bother to pick apart all the other errors we made, as that would quickly get boring, but suffice to say we were as much to blame for the loss due to our terrible mistakes as the All Blacks were for being on form and playing well. Ultimately, they did not dominate. They exploited. The worst kind of loss for a home crowd (a capacity one of 66,000).
Understandably then, the next weeks game against the Saffers attracted far fewer spectators. In fairness, the weather was tripe as well. But for myself, Ryan and the 36 odd thousand who did go, what a treat! Once again, the negatives that we didn't score a try and looked wooden in attack were all true but once again it didn't matter as we came away with the victory.
This one was much more convincing than the win over Australia last year. The South Africans weren't brilliant, but this was mainly down to their poor handling and decision making in the bad weather. An experienced international side, world champions no less, should be able to cope and will have experienced similar conditions before. Therefore, our victory must have came thanks to superior preparation and better execution.
Watching the game from up high, I could still tell that the Scots wanted this game. No more evidence of this is needed than Dan Parks taking a simply monstrous hit while attempting a drop goal at the end of the first half and popping straight back up to his feet to continue playing, with not a care about his safety. Now that is a rarity for Dan the Man!
The win again came on the back of the forwards, who were excellent against a South African pack who bludgeoned England down to size the next week. Big Richie Gray is every bit as good as English media darling Courtney Lawes as far as I have seen, but would remain unnoticed were it not for intrepid writers such as myself bringing up his name! John Barclay is the best openside in the British Isles without question, and Kelly Brown is second to Stephen Ferris at 6; hardly a bad player to be second to I might add.
The backs are still underwhelming, but at least have the defensive part of their game nailed down. Graeme Morrison in particular did well considering he is a player whose limits are fairly apparent. Rory Lawson confirmed my faith in him, as did Ruiridh Jackson against Samoa.
Overall, the Autumn went well. The attributes the Scots used to win the South Africa affair will allow them to be competitive in the Six Nations. As a team, we match up well against the Irish due to our forward prowess and can take on England and Wales with some confidence.
Winning close games will also come in useful at the 2011 World Cup. People forget that but for a narrow, narrow loss to Argentina in 2007 Scotland would have been World Cup Semi Finalists. That is where we should ultimately be aiming for. Bollocks to the aim low crowd
Finally, I'll just say that if Andy Robinson keeps this vein of performances up he should be strongly considered for a position with the Lions when the time comes.
Lad Awards for November - International Edition
None of the club players deserve much of a mention this month. The best performers in my book were:
Edinburgh: Greg Laidlaw, Fraser McKenzie, Tim Visser (standard)
Glasgow: DTH Van Der Merwe, Dougie Hall
Now on to the international lads.
Most Laddish Forward: Kelly Brown. Ross Ford was also good, combining his usual solid loose game and scrummaging with good performances at the lineout. Brown, though, is my choice. Consistent and safe, he took pretty much every kickoff and didn't drop a single one. Always committed and brave, he racked up impressive tackle counts in each game.
Most 'Laddish' (NB: backs cannot be true Lads) Back: Rory Lawson. South Africa are a very tough team to play against for a scrumhalf. Lawson put in an excellent performance, much like he did last year against Australia.
Phil Godman Award for Uselessness: Nikki Walker. What the fuck was he doing scoring a try! We don't score tries! He doesn't score tries! Nobody really stood out as being shit individually. We win as a team, and get pumped as a team.
LAD of the Month: John Barclay. Give the man the captaincy already. If the Lions were playing next week, he would be the starting 7 without question. Come the 2013 tour, he might be as well.
GM (with thanks the the great Bill McLaren for providing the title)
Tuesday 21 December 2010
Mastery Comes in Many Forms
The world is running out of superlatives for Sachin Tendulkar. I had always felt that I had missed the boat with the Little Master. A relative latecomer to the game (sadly one of those jumping on the Ashes 2005 bandwagon - I just managed to stay on it!), I starting watching at a time when he seemed to be in decline, dogged by an elbow injury and seemingly winding down on a farewell tour in front of adoring fans. And then something changed. In the last 3 calendar years alone he has hit 13 Test tons, 7 of them in 2010, his most productive year of all, 2 whole decades after he first entered the international fray. Suddenly, I found myself enjoying Sachin's golden autumn, possibly even more magical than everything he had accomplished before. It is astonishing to see the power that a man of his stature manages to generate and combined with the strength and elegance packed into wrists, it makes him a force to be reckoned with on all surfaces, not just the featherbeds of the subcontinent. His cover drives and cut shots are still the best in the game.
Then there is the temperament of the man. Apparently there are 2 billion Christians in the world, all of whom worship God. There are 1 billion Indians, all of whom revere Tendulkar. Essentially, he has half the following of an omnipotent being and actually exists to have to deal with all of the pressure that comes with this reverance. And yet his enthusiasm for cricket, be it a Test for India or a T20 for his beloved Mumbai Indians, is undampened, his attitude never called into question by his superiors - the cult of celebrity which dogs many a talented footballer has never penetrated the mind of SRT. Here is a true role model to those who idolise him. I don't particularly like the Indian cricket team and the obsessive fanaticism which follows them everywhere, but I admire Tendulkar, and have taken great pleasure in watching him - I begrudge him nothing.
Now, as I have said previously, I am not just following the Ashes this winter. You may recall my cheeky wee prediction that Tendulkar would record his 50th Test century in Centurion. Well, I was right. 111 unbeaten runs in the second innings, in which he demonstrated all of his great strengths against the best pace attack in the world, and history was made. He will probably go on to make 15,000 Test runs in the near future and will enjoy one last tour to England next summer in what is sure to be a classic series. And yet, he is not the only true great to make a little bit of history at SuperSport Park. Sometimes, the result of a match (India got slaughtered by an innings and 25 runs) is not important. It is what the individuals achieve that makes it so memorable. This is what makes cricket unique amongst team sports.
I'm talking, of course, about Jacques Henry Kallis. Kallis has just celebrated 15 years in the international game and for my money is by far South Africa's best player since the readmission. Contrast his average (56.82) to Tendulkar's (56.91). When you've played as much cricket as these two, the difference is negligible. On top of that, Kallis has also taken 269 Test wickets with his fast medium swing bowling, which remains effective to this day, even if Kallis prefers to stand at slip to the younger, quicker men! There was just one blot on his CV - no double century. What better stage than against the World No.1 side to right the wrong? 201* did very nicely.
So why is Kallis so much less revered than Tendulkar? The first reason is the sheer volume of cricket in India in contrast to South Africa, which must compete with rugby and football. Kabaddi just doesn't cut it! Kallis' brand of cricket makes it to a far narrower audience. This brand in itself is far less watchable than Tendulkar, preferring to biff the ball around or accumulate stodgily, rather than caressing the ball into the gaps. Finally, there is Kallis' attitude, most prominently brought to light in former teammate Herschelle Gibbs' autobiography. It was claimed that Kallis, along with other senior players, ruled the dressing room and soured the atmosphere. This is sheer pish from a bitter man who, while clearly a more talented batsman than Kallis, never lived up to his potential. However, it is true that his fitness has often been an issue and his batting style has been said to be quite selfish at times, a trait never associated with Tendulkar.
All that said, just because he is less celebrated in the wider public, does not mean that we at Beyond the Cliche value him any less than the Little Master. Both have accomplished great things in the game in their own way and their performances in Centurion were equally worthy of praise. You do not have to entertain, or capture the spirit of a nation, to excel in your game - a fact worth remembering in all walks of life.
Gordon Brown for example...
RM
Then there is the temperament of the man. Apparently there are 2 billion Christians in the world, all of whom worship God. There are 1 billion Indians, all of whom revere Tendulkar. Essentially, he has half the following of an omnipotent being and actually exists to have to deal with all of the pressure that comes with this reverance. And yet his enthusiasm for cricket, be it a Test for India or a T20 for his beloved Mumbai Indians, is undampened, his attitude never called into question by his superiors - the cult of celebrity which dogs many a talented footballer has never penetrated the mind of SRT. Here is a true role model to those who idolise him. I don't particularly like the Indian cricket team and the obsessive fanaticism which follows them everywhere, but I admire Tendulkar, and have taken great pleasure in watching him - I begrudge him nothing.
Now, as I have said previously, I am not just following the Ashes this winter. You may recall my cheeky wee prediction that Tendulkar would record his 50th Test century in Centurion. Well, I was right. 111 unbeaten runs in the second innings, in which he demonstrated all of his great strengths against the best pace attack in the world, and history was made. He will probably go on to make 15,000 Test runs in the near future and will enjoy one last tour to England next summer in what is sure to be a classic series. And yet, he is not the only true great to make a little bit of history at SuperSport Park. Sometimes, the result of a match (India got slaughtered by an innings and 25 runs) is not important. It is what the individuals achieve that makes it so memorable. This is what makes cricket unique amongst team sports.
I'm talking, of course, about Jacques Henry Kallis. Kallis has just celebrated 15 years in the international game and for my money is by far South Africa's best player since the readmission. Contrast his average (56.82) to Tendulkar's (56.91). When you've played as much cricket as these two, the difference is negligible. On top of that, Kallis has also taken 269 Test wickets with his fast medium swing bowling, which remains effective to this day, even if Kallis prefers to stand at slip to the younger, quicker men! There was just one blot on his CV - no double century. What better stage than against the World No.1 side to right the wrong? 201* did very nicely.
So why is Kallis so much less revered than Tendulkar? The first reason is the sheer volume of cricket in India in contrast to South Africa, which must compete with rugby and football. Kabaddi just doesn't cut it! Kallis' brand of cricket makes it to a far narrower audience. This brand in itself is far less watchable than Tendulkar, preferring to biff the ball around or accumulate stodgily, rather than caressing the ball into the gaps. Finally, there is Kallis' attitude, most prominently brought to light in former teammate Herschelle Gibbs' autobiography. It was claimed that Kallis, along with other senior players, ruled the dressing room and soured the atmosphere. This is sheer pish from a bitter man who, while clearly a more talented batsman than Kallis, never lived up to his potential. However, it is true that his fitness has often been an issue and his batting style has been said to be quite selfish at times, a trait never associated with Tendulkar.
All that said, just because he is less celebrated in the wider public, does not mean that we at Beyond the Cliche value him any less than the Little Master. Both have accomplished great things in the game in their own way and their performances in Centurion were equally worthy of praise. You do not have to entertain, or capture the spirit of a nation, to excel in your game - a fact worth remembering in all walks of life.
Gordon Brown for example...
RM
The RedZone: Week 15 in the NFL
Merry Christmas to all readers of the RedZone! Being the season of goodwill, many defences decided that now was the time to start handing out touchdowns like Christmas presents! It all made for a pretty exciting weekend of action as the postseason draws ever nearer - here's the best of the best:
Ryan's Top 5
5. Dan Connolly - 71-yard kickoff return. I loved Jason Baker's tackle. I loved Reggie Hodges' fake punt run. But this is by far my favourite play of the season. Patriots G Connolly looked as shocked as anyone when Mason Crosby's kick landed in his arms. He then managed to rumble up the length of the field to the Packers' 4, whilst failing miserably to get up any speed. He also deserves credit on behalf of the entire offensive line for protecting Tom Brady so brilliantly this season. New England ran out 31-27 winners in this one.
4. Peyton Manning - 29/39, 229 yards, 2 TD's. OK, so these aren't Peyton's greatest numbers ever, but context is everything. Having struggled horrendously over the past few weeks, throwing 11 picks in 3 games, Manning's Colts were sliding out of the playoff picture. That could all change with a big result against the flying Jaguars. And a 34-24 success was achieved. Manning managed to find Austin Collie in the endzone twice before the WR's head exploded (again!) and also facilitated the Colts' most effective rushing game in ages, with Donald Brown leading the charge.
3. Jason Witten - 10 catches, 140 yards, 1 TD. Comfortably the best TE in the NFC. With Jon Kitna fast running out of receiving options, Witten has consistently made himself available and made big plays. The Cowboys have actually flourished without Tony Romo, thanks mainly to the big man and Miles Austin. That the defence almost conspired to lose the game to the Redskins is a concern, but David Buhler's late FG squeezed out a 33-30 win.
2. Vincent Jackson - 5 catches, 112 yards, 3 TD's. So many "What if's?" in San Diego. What if V-Jax had been available all season? Will Norv Turner ever get the Chargers off to a flyer? What if Baxter hadn't been punted off a bridge by the man on the motorcycle? OK ignore the last one. In the case of V-Jax, we almost certainly wouldn't still be talking about the Chargers special teams or indeed the Chiefs as AFC West Champions elect. The man has a great skill set and will now almost certainly be franchised after leading the side to a 34-7 blowout over the 49ers.
1. Jamar Chaney - 12 tackles, 4 assists, 1 FF. I'm avoiding the obvious here. I'm avoiding Michael Vick and DeSean Jackson, as there really is nothing more to add to their story in the amazing Eagles comeback from 21 points down to beat the Giants 38-31. A defensive player looks a little odd when a team gives up 31 points and Eli throws 4 TD's. But Chaney is an undrafted rookie, making his first start at MLB after defensive leader Stewart Bradley went down with an elbow injury against the Cowboys. To be involved in 16 tackles, shows a pretty good engine! And the fumble forced deep in Giants territory allowed Vick to find Jeremy Maclin and the comeback was kickstarted. So I've picked an unheralded and unlikely catalyst for an amazing victory and one that ensures I'll be enjoying playoff football come 2011!
Graeme's Top 5
Well, it's come to that time of year. The time of crucial games and playoff hopes. And, of course, the Redskins are once again beyond relevance. Rex Grossman is now our starter, putting a demoralising end to this season and the McNabb experiment. Time to start watching film of Jake Locker and Ryan Mallett methinks.
5. Devin Hester - Set new NFL record with his 14th career punt return TD - Hester also contributed a 15 yard receiving score in Chicago's win over the Vikings in a snow covered University of Minnesota Stadium, standing in for the not-so-structurally-sound Metrodome. A sporting event played after 6 plus inches of snowfall and where the spectators didn't all fall over and die; it can be done people! Bears coach Lovie Smith made the idiotic decision to stop Hester returning punts last year, but at least he has learned from his monumental mistake. Hester is the best returner I have ever seen and is the first punt returner I know of that basically dragged his team to a Superbowl by himself. This Bears side have a much better chance of getting to another big game when he is standing deep to return.
4. Matt Flynn - 24/37, 251 yards, 3 TD's - For a first career start, this wasn't too bad really was it? The Patriots are good at playing against one dimensional teams, and Green Bay is certainly that due to their lack of any ground game. In spite of this Flynn kept the Pack fighting until the end, demonstrating how good the Green Bay passing attack and pass blocking is, even shorn of Jermichael Finlay and Mr Rodgers.
3. Ray Rice - 153 yards 1 TD rushing, 80 yards 1 TD receiving - The New Orleans D couldn't handle Ray Ray out of the backfield, as evidenced by his 80 receiving yards. The 153 rushing yards helped to control the tempo of the game, eating up clock and putting Drew Brees under pressure. The Ravens' defence ramped it up as well, playing their best football of the year in parts. They dominated in the first quarter.
2. Calvin Johnson - 10 catches, 152 yards - 9 first downs, 4 of them on third down, and with Drew Stanton under centre makes this performance even better. Even against an Aqib Talib-less Bucs side, this was impressive. Johnson is, in my opinion, the best wide receiver in the NFL by a clear margin. You will all know by now that I like to quote measurables, but just watch this bloke make the catches he does at 6 foot 5 and 240 pounds. He strides like a racehorse, and once he gets a step on you he is uncatchable. Truly an athletic marvel, the only comparison would be some bulked up super Usain Bolt who can also do the high jump. Randy Moss will one day be referred to as Calvin Johnson-lite.
1. Michael Vick - It hurts too much to list off his stats for another week. Not only has he taken the Eagles into the midst of contention, he has also learned to pass properly and thus all the jokes I stockpiled about him during his Falcons days have become redundant. I will say, though, that he is not unstoppable. For all the commentators hyping him up as some kind of untouchable deity, he produced zero first downs, two sacks and an INT in the first half of this game. If forcing him to violate his parole restrictions doesn't work then solid zone coverage, a linebacker spy and at least 3 quick D linemen able to get penetration by themselves by rotating without blitzing will cause him a fair number of problems. The Giants stupidly got fancy and tried blitzing safeties, who Vick promptly sprinted past with ease. If they held their discipline and nerve, perhaps they could have limited him more. As a last point, Vick is right handed but throws with his left. The classic strategy for pressuring him was to force him to roll to the right. What would happen if Vick taught himself to throw with his right hand as well and became an ambidextrous QB? Would there be any point in turning up?
GM and RM
Ryan's Top 5
5. Dan Connolly - 71-yard kickoff return. I loved Jason Baker's tackle. I loved Reggie Hodges' fake punt run. But this is by far my favourite play of the season. Patriots G Connolly looked as shocked as anyone when Mason Crosby's kick landed in his arms. He then managed to rumble up the length of the field to the Packers' 4, whilst failing miserably to get up any speed. He also deserves credit on behalf of the entire offensive line for protecting Tom Brady so brilliantly this season. New England ran out 31-27 winners in this one.
4. Peyton Manning - 29/39, 229 yards, 2 TD's. OK, so these aren't Peyton's greatest numbers ever, but context is everything. Having struggled horrendously over the past few weeks, throwing 11 picks in 3 games, Manning's Colts were sliding out of the playoff picture. That could all change with a big result against the flying Jaguars. And a 34-24 success was achieved. Manning managed to find Austin Collie in the endzone twice before the WR's head exploded (again!) and also facilitated the Colts' most effective rushing game in ages, with Donald Brown leading the charge.
3. Jason Witten - 10 catches, 140 yards, 1 TD. Comfortably the best TE in the NFC. With Jon Kitna fast running out of receiving options, Witten has consistently made himself available and made big plays. The Cowboys have actually flourished without Tony Romo, thanks mainly to the big man and Miles Austin. That the defence almost conspired to lose the game to the Redskins is a concern, but David Buhler's late FG squeezed out a 33-30 win.
2. Vincent Jackson - 5 catches, 112 yards, 3 TD's. So many "What if's?" in San Diego. What if V-Jax had been available all season? Will Norv Turner ever get the Chargers off to a flyer? What if Baxter hadn't been punted off a bridge by the man on the motorcycle? OK ignore the last one. In the case of V-Jax, we almost certainly wouldn't still be talking about the Chargers special teams or indeed the Chiefs as AFC West Champions elect. The man has a great skill set and will now almost certainly be franchised after leading the side to a 34-7 blowout over the 49ers.
1. Jamar Chaney - 12 tackles, 4 assists, 1 FF. I'm avoiding the obvious here. I'm avoiding Michael Vick and DeSean Jackson, as there really is nothing more to add to their story in the amazing Eagles comeback from 21 points down to beat the Giants 38-31. A defensive player looks a little odd when a team gives up 31 points and Eli throws 4 TD's. But Chaney is an undrafted rookie, making his first start at MLB after defensive leader Stewart Bradley went down with an elbow injury against the Cowboys. To be involved in 16 tackles, shows a pretty good engine! And the fumble forced deep in Giants territory allowed Vick to find Jeremy Maclin and the comeback was kickstarted. So I've picked an unheralded and unlikely catalyst for an amazing victory and one that ensures I'll be enjoying playoff football come 2011!
Graeme's Top 5
Well, it's come to that time of year. The time of crucial games and playoff hopes. And, of course, the Redskins are once again beyond relevance. Rex Grossman is now our starter, putting a demoralising end to this season and the McNabb experiment. Time to start watching film of Jake Locker and Ryan Mallett methinks.
5. Devin Hester - Set new NFL record with his 14th career punt return TD - Hester also contributed a 15 yard receiving score in Chicago's win over the Vikings in a snow covered University of Minnesota Stadium, standing in for the not-so-structurally-sound Metrodome. A sporting event played after 6 plus inches of snowfall and where the spectators didn't all fall over and die; it can be done people! Bears coach Lovie Smith made the idiotic decision to stop Hester returning punts last year, but at least he has learned from his monumental mistake. Hester is the best returner I have ever seen and is the first punt returner I know of that basically dragged his team to a Superbowl by himself. This Bears side have a much better chance of getting to another big game when he is standing deep to return.
4. Matt Flynn - 24/37, 251 yards, 3 TD's - For a first career start, this wasn't too bad really was it? The Patriots are good at playing against one dimensional teams, and Green Bay is certainly that due to their lack of any ground game. In spite of this Flynn kept the Pack fighting until the end, demonstrating how good the Green Bay passing attack and pass blocking is, even shorn of Jermichael Finlay and Mr Rodgers.
3. Ray Rice - 153 yards 1 TD rushing, 80 yards 1 TD receiving - The New Orleans D couldn't handle Ray Ray out of the backfield, as evidenced by his 80 receiving yards. The 153 rushing yards helped to control the tempo of the game, eating up clock and putting Drew Brees under pressure. The Ravens' defence ramped it up as well, playing their best football of the year in parts. They dominated in the first quarter.
2. Calvin Johnson - 10 catches, 152 yards - 9 first downs, 4 of them on third down, and with Drew Stanton under centre makes this performance even better. Even against an Aqib Talib-less Bucs side, this was impressive. Johnson is, in my opinion, the best wide receiver in the NFL by a clear margin. You will all know by now that I like to quote measurables, but just watch this bloke make the catches he does at 6 foot 5 and 240 pounds. He strides like a racehorse, and once he gets a step on you he is uncatchable. Truly an athletic marvel, the only comparison would be some bulked up super Usain Bolt who can also do the high jump. Randy Moss will one day be referred to as Calvin Johnson-lite.
1. Michael Vick - It hurts too much to list off his stats for another week. Not only has he taken the Eagles into the midst of contention, he has also learned to pass properly and thus all the jokes I stockpiled about him during his Falcons days have become redundant. I will say, though, that he is not unstoppable. For all the commentators hyping him up as some kind of untouchable deity, he produced zero first downs, two sacks and an INT in the first half of this game. If forcing him to violate his parole restrictions doesn't work then solid zone coverage, a linebacker spy and at least 3 quick D linemen able to get penetration by themselves by rotating without blitzing will cause him a fair number of problems. The Giants stupidly got fancy and tried blitzing safeties, who Vick promptly sprinted past with ease. If they held their discipline and nerve, perhaps they could have limited him more. As a last point, Vick is right handed but throws with his left. The classic strategy for pressuring him was to force him to roll to the right. What would happen if Vick taught himself to throw with his right hand as well and became an ambidextrous QB? Would there be any point in turning up?
GM and RM
Monday 20 December 2010
Home and Away - The Ashes Tour - The 3rd Test
It was all too good to be true. England seemed set to sweep the series after their performance in Adelaide and yet the batting which had served them so well in the first two matches failed to appear at the WACA, in the face of a spirited Australian fightback with ball in hand. Having reviewed my work on the last two matches, I've realised that a day-by-day account descends too much into a match report, rather than the opinion and analysis, which is after all the raison d'etre here at BtC, where we alone believe that our opinions and analyses mean something. So here's the score and some expert views from Game 3 in the 2010-11 Ashes:
3rd Test (Perth) - Australia 268 (Johnson 62, Hussey 61, Haddin 53) and 309 (Hussey 116, Watson 95, Tremlett 5-87) beat England 187 (Bell 53, Strauss 52, Johnson 6-38) and 123 (Harris 6-47) by 267 runs
By all accounts, it's a bit of a pasting. The first thing you may be wondering is this: Mitchell Johnson? Wasn't he rubbish about two weeks ago? The answer to this is yes. And I believe he will remain one of the most enigmatic figures in world cricket for the forseeable future - this match was no permanent renaissance. The pitch at the WACA has always favoured the quick men, and Johnson is about as quick as they come. Add in the Fremantle Doctor, and you have a swinging ball at 90+mph. When you have players like Cook, Collingwood, Strauss and Bell who all favour playing off the backfoot, all you have to do is pitch the ball up and watch it hoop around. Buoyed by his lower order batting effort (see ball, hit ball, as per usual - great to watch but as a bowler you always fancy your chances), Johnson steamed in and did just that. And by not overthinking and overcomplicating his technique, success came far easier than it did at the Gabba.
Speaking of the lower order batting, is this the point at which the momentum slipped from England, however happy they would have felt with the state of affairs after day 1. From 69-5, 268 is a let-off. And the main culprits in this game were Steven Finn and Graeme Swann. Finn, to his credit, took 5 wickets in the match, and is the leading wicket-taker in the series. However, he leaks boundaries like they're going out of fashion and looked pretty exhausted after the heavy demands which have been placed on him. I expect he'll miss the MCG game, allowing Ajmal Shahzad the opportunity to reverse the ball and trouble the left-handers, in particular Michael Hussey. The case of Swann is more difficult. He is the leading spinner in the world and Australia know that, and, owing to their own lack of spin and the helpful pitch at Adelaide, are preparing green-tops in Melbourne and Sydney to negate his influence, thus limiting an already stretched four-man attack. But he should be perservered with. Both men dropped too short far too often and were punished accordingly. Chris Tremlett, however, bowled magnificently, both at a suitable and varied length and in a dangerous channel, which had the batsmen in two minds whether to play the ball. A maiden five-for was thoroughly merited.
And what of the batsmen? A reluctance to get forward has already been identified as a problem and is an issue in particular with Paul Collingwood. Contrast his style with that of Shane Watson, an old-style foot planter and then contrast their averages in this series. Collingwood must adapt or face being dropped. Personally, I would give him one more chance at No.6 where he can scrap all he wants with the tail, and allow Ian Bell to move up and play more fluently while his form is hot. Australia still have frailties, but these were papered over by another magnificent innings by Hussey. A man who knows the Perth pitch better than anyone, he pulled England to shreds and has basically abandoned the blocking mentality that saw his Test career almost come to an end before this series. How foolish that notion seems now. The only change I can see is if Ricky Ponting fails to recover from a broken finger sustained by shelling Jonathan Trott at slip (although such was Australia's turnaround in fortune that Haddin snaffled the rebound). If Ricky does miss out at the MCG, and he definitely won't want to, Usman Khawaja should make his Test bow, in a situation similar to that in which Trott made his debut at the Oval last year.
The series is back on the line. Which means that cricket fans have something to look forward to over Christmas, outwith the usual festivities of enjoying far too much food and watching far too much television!
RM
3rd Test (Perth) - Australia 268 (Johnson 62, Hussey 61, Haddin 53) and 309 (Hussey 116, Watson 95, Tremlett 5-87) beat England 187 (Bell 53, Strauss 52, Johnson 6-38) and 123 (Harris 6-47) by 267 runs
By all accounts, it's a bit of a pasting. The first thing you may be wondering is this: Mitchell Johnson? Wasn't he rubbish about two weeks ago? The answer to this is yes. And I believe he will remain one of the most enigmatic figures in world cricket for the forseeable future - this match was no permanent renaissance. The pitch at the WACA has always favoured the quick men, and Johnson is about as quick as they come. Add in the Fremantle Doctor, and you have a swinging ball at 90+mph. When you have players like Cook, Collingwood, Strauss and Bell who all favour playing off the backfoot, all you have to do is pitch the ball up and watch it hoop around. Buoyed by his lower order batting effort (see ball, hit ball, as per usual - great to watch but as a bowler you always fancy your chances), Johnson steamed in and did just that. And by not overthinking and overcomplicating his technique, success came far easier than it did at the Gabba.
Speaking of the lower order batting, is this the point at which the momentum slipped from England, however happy they would have felt with the state of affairs after day 1. From 69-5, 268 is a let-off. And the main culprits in this game were Steven Finn and Graeme Swann. Finn, to his credit, took 5 wickets in the match, and is the leading wicket-taker in the series. However, he leaks boundaries like they're going out of fashion and looked pretty exhausted after the heavy demands which have been placed on him. I expect he'll miss the MCG game, allowing Ajmal Shahzad the opportunity to reverse the ball and trouble the left-handers, in particular Michael Hussey. The case of Swann is more difficult. He is the leading spinner in the world and Australia know that, and, owing to their own lack of spin and the helpful pitch at Adelaide, are preparing green-tops in Melbourne and Sydney to negate his influence, thus limiting an already stretched four-man attack. But he should be perservered with. Both men dropped too short far too often and were punished accordingly. Chris Tremlett, however, bowled magnificently, both at a suitable and varied length and in a dangerous channel, which had the batsmen in two minds whether to play the ball. A maiden five-for was thoroughly merited.
And what of the batsmen? A reluctance to get forward has already been identified as a problem and is an issue in particular with Paul Collingwood. Contrast his style with that of Shane Watson, an old-style foot planter and then contrast their averages in this series. Collingwood must adapt or face being dropped. Personally, I would give him one more chance at No.6 where he can scrap all he wants with the tail, and allow Ian Bell to move up and play more fluently while his form is hot. Australia still have frailties, but these were papered over by another magnificent innings by Hussey. A man who knows the Perth pitch better than anyone, he pulled England to shreds and has basically abandoned the blocking mentality that saw his Test career almost come to an end before this series. How foolish that notion seems now. The only change I can see is if Ricky Ponting fails to recover from a broken finger sustained by shelling Jonathan Trott at slip (although such was Australia's turnaround in fortune that Haddin snaffled the rebound). If Ricky does miss out at the MCG, and he definitely won't want to, Usman Khawaja should make his Test bow, in a situation similar to that in which Trott made his debut at the Oval last year.
The series is back on the line. Which means that cricket fans have something to look forward to over Christmas, outwith the usual festivities of enjoying far too much food and watching far too much television!
RM
Wednesday 15 December 2010
Home and Away - the Ashes Tour: Beer's on the House!
No Test match this week, but still plenty to keep the keenest cricket fan occupied, thanks to some ludicrous headlines and selection decisions. We might as well start with the latter, seeing as everyone is still talking about it (apart from the entire population of Scotland, that is). Michael Beer is now the 10th spinner to pull on the baggy green since Shane Warne's retirement. A left-armer like Xavier Doherty, he has been picked mainly because the next test is at his home ground, the WACA in Perth. With one small problem - he has only played 6 first-class games in all, 4 of which were at this so called "home ground". You can guarantee that most of the more weather-worn spinners, your Bryce McGains and Beau Cassons of this world, will have played many more times than that in Perth. The only logic I can think of is that Cricket Australia have made the selection not knowing how good he is, so his inevitable mediocrity comes as a surprise to everyone. With his predecessors the fact that they blatantly weren't good enough to cut it at the highest level was well known!
With such scatter-brained thinking from the Aussie selectors, the public have launched a campaign to bring Shane Warne back into the side at the tender age of 41 (only 5 years older than when McGain made his ill-fated debut). Warne is now a professional poker player - he isn't going to gamble his reputation on the weakest Aussie side in a generation - once you fold, you fold. And he's had other more domestic issues to deal with this week. His online Twitter flirting with Liz Hurley attracted a lot of attention and forced them both to admit that they'd recently split from their partners. And both clearly moved on!
In other news, Simon Katich is injured (probably out of the Test team for good - a shame, he's been a faithful and effective servant), Marcus North, Xavier Doherty and Doug Bollinger all ejected from the side that were routed in Adelaide. Back come Mitchell Johnson and Ben Hilfenhaus after one Test on the sidelines.(further proof of CA's selection inconsistency) and young-guns Steven Smith and Phillip Hughes are back as well, and will both start tomorrow morning. Hughes will want to banish memories of 2009, when the short ball proved his downfall and Smith will want to cement a reputation as the new Warne, whilst holding down a batting slot in the Top 6 in place of North. An impossible task in my opinion, but I do feel that on the WACA pitch, Smith should play the lone spinner role (probably backed by Michael Clarke if needs be) while 4 pacemen get a run-out on a bouncy and quick surface. Beer can ironically carry the drinks!
England's build-up has been far more sedate, the only disruption being James Anderson's flight home to be at the birth of his second child. I actually speculated with my team-mates over a curry what he would call them. Sadly, my suggestion of Bowled Anderson has not been taken up. They will make one change, with Stuart Broad's tour over. And, with a shootout between three men proving nothing, the selectors have got it right in opting for 6'7'' Chris Tremlett, who will hopefully find plenty of assistance from the WACA pitch. Speaking of that pointless tour match, here is the scorecard:
Victoria 216-2d (Hill 105*, D Hussey 67*) and 278-6d (Carters 68, McKay 58*) drew with England 184-2d (Strauss 66, Bell 60*) and 211-6 (Prior 102*, McKay 4-68)
The game got so ridiculous that Strauss brought himself and Eoin Morgan on to hurry the declaration. Both went at over 2 runs a ball, although Strauss did snare a guy lbw, even though it was obviously missing leg stump! Good for Prior to get some runs though, and Clint McKay has at least sent out a message that he should not be ignored in Australia's pace bowling ranks. However, the MCG curators will need to create a more spicy pitch for the 4th Test if the hosts are to force a win in the series!
Finally, a note on the South Africa vs India series which starts tomorrow. This is the real battle of intrigue this winter, being as it is 2 vs 1 in the Test Match rankings. That said, SA will start as favourites on their home turf. But nobody in England will give it any attention, even if it will probably be a classic series, with the prospect of Sachin Tendulkar becoming the first man to 50 Test centuries. Will he see the irony and notch it in the 1st Test in Centurion?
I may be the only one who bothers to find out!
RM
With such scatter-brained thinking from the Aussie selectors, the public have launched a campaign to bring Shane Warne back into the side at the tender age of 41 (only 5 years older than when McGain made his ill-fated debut). Warne is now a professional poker player - he isn't going to gamble his reputation on the weakest Aussie side in a generation - once you fold, you fold. And he's had other more domestic issues to deal with this week. His online Twitter flirting with Liz Hurley attracted a lot of attention and forced them both to admit that they'd recently split from their partners. And both clearly moved on!
In other news, Simon Katich is injured (probably out of the Test team for good - a shame, he's been a faithful and effective servant), Marcus North, Xavier Doherty and Doug Bollinger all ejected from the side that were routed in Adelaide. Back come Mitchell Johnson and Ben Hilfenhaus after one Test on the sidelines.(further proof of CA's selection inconsistency) and young-guns Steven Smith and Phillip Hughes are back as well, and will both start tomorrow morning. Hughes will want to banish memories of 2009, when the short ball proved his downfall and Smith will want to cement a reputation as the new Warne, whilst holding down a batting slot in the Top 6 in place of North. An impossible task in my opinion, but I do feel that on the WACA pitch, Smith should play the lone spinner role (probably backed by Michael Clarke if needs be) while 4 pacemen get a run-out on a bouncy and quick surface. Beer can ironically carry the drinks!
England's build-up has been far more sedate, the only disruption being James Anderson's flight home to be at the birth of his second child. I actually speculated with my team-mates over a curry what he would call them. Sadly, my suggestion of Bowled Anderson has not been taken up. They will make one change, with Stuart Broad's tour over. And, with a shootout between three men proving nothing, the selectors have got it right in opting for 6'7'' Chris Tremlett, who will hopefully find plenty of assistance from the WACA pitch. Speaking of that pointless tour match, here is the scorecard:
Victoria 216-2d (Hill 105*, D Hussey 67*) and 278-6d (Carters 68, McKay 58*) drew with England 184-2d (Strauss 66, Bell 60*) and 211-6 (Prior 102*, McKay 4-68)
The game got so ridiculous that Strauss brought himself and Eoin Morgan on to hurry the declaration. Both went at over 2 runs a ball, although Strauss did snare a guy lbw, even though it was obviously missing leg stump! Good for Prior to get some runs though, and Clint McKay has at least sent out a message that he should not be ignored in Australia's pace bowling ranks. However, the MCG curators will need to create a more spicy pitch for the 4th Test if the hosts are to force a win in the series!
Finally, a note on the South Africa vs India series which starts tomorrow. This is the real battle of intrigue this winter, being as it is 2 vs 1 in the Test Match rankings. That said, SA will start as favourites on their home turf. But nobody in England will give it any attention, even if it will probably be a classic series, with the prospect of Sachin Tendulkar becoming the first man to 50 Test centuries. Will he see the irony and notch it in the 1st Test in Centurion?
I may be the only one who bothers to find out!
RM
This New Age of Sports Betting Terrifies Me!
Those Bet365 adverts are annoying, aren't they? Ray Winstone telling you to stake your cash on West Brom getting a corner in the next 29 seconds and it being taken by a player born in a country south of the 13th parallel. Oh, bad luck with that one. But Hadjuk Split are announcing the official attendance of their game in a minute. Between 4356 and 4859?
Do you even know who Hadjuk Split are? You know they used to exist; do they still exist now? Can you be sure? Maybe you should Wikipedia it, but you only have 17 seconds left to put the bet on! There's no time! Panic, pressure. Arrggghhhhh!!!
Betting used to be simple. Go to a bookies with your mates, pick up one of the impossibly small pencils that make you feel like a big man and fill in a little slip of paper. Tick a few of the boxes and hand to the bird behind the counter. Leave.
I did this most weekends as a Fresher. It was the given thing for us sports-knowledgable lads to do.
I used to win almost all the time. That was nice, and the winnings meant a couple of extra pints. But that wasn't why I did it, or why any of us did it because we never actually made that much money. At the end of the day, we all knew too much about sports. We would consider all the likely results and bet on them. The likely results do not make you much profit.
I was on a train to Glasgow a couple of months ago. I remember vividly the conversation the two blokes next to me had:
"Wanna head up the bookies?"
"What fitba's on?"
"Some Eastern European shite"
"Aye, I'll come. But I'm only spending 50 this time"
I am an excellent predictor of results. I am, however, a terrible better. I am too programmed to follow the old adage 'knowledge is power' . I spend ages debating, analysing, pontificating on each bet. I will know at least a little about each and every one of the obscure 'Eastern European shite' teams. And this will stop me betting on them.
What kind of a person can so blithly throw money at things they don't have the slightest clue about? If you win, it's not through your knowledge or ability. Those are two things that I need to use to feel satified when betting because I am, in short, a narcissistic ego-maniac (I do have some nicer qualities).
And it is not reckless, or brave or free-spirited either. I applaud these traits more than most, but when I feel reckless, or brave or free-spirited with my money I go out and get absolutely pissed on one pound vodkas, or buy stupid trainers meant for black people, or watch Scotland play.
It is almost as if people now bet simply because the opportunity is there, handed to them on a plate by hundreds of TV adverts and internet pop-ups. I went to look at my Fantasy Football team earlier today (which obviously exists to prove my knowledge and fuel my ego) and I ended up with 3 separate SkyBet pop-ups tarnishing my screen, shouting at me.
This piece hasn't really gone anywhere, and for that I apologise. I just felt like saying all this, as isn't that what a blog is for? Normal, objective anaylsis and opinion will resume again soon I promise.
Normal, objective analysis and opinion to resume 16/12/10 - 2/1
Normal, objective analysis and opinion to resume 17/12/10 - 11/5
Normal, obective analysis and opinion to never, ever return - 3/14
I'm Ray Winstone. Bet on the next letter Graeme types!!! For "A" 7/1. For "B" 13/1...
GM
Do you even know who Hadjuk Split are? You know they used to exist; do they still exist now? Can you be sure? Maybe you should Wikipedia it, but you only have 17 seconds left to put the bet on! There's no time! Panic, pressure. Arrggghhhhh!!!
Betting used to be simple. Go to a bookies with your mates, pick up one of the impossibly small pencils that make you feel like a big man and fill in a little slip of paper. Tick a few of the boxes and hand to the bird behind the counter. Leave.
I did this most weekends as a Fresher. It was the given thing for us sports-knowledgable lads to do.
I used to win almost all the time. That was nice, and the winnings meant a couple of extra pints. But that wasn't why I did it, or why any of us did it because we never actually made that much money. At the end of the day, we all knew too much about sports. We would consider all the likely results and bet on them. The likely results do not make you much profit.
I was on a train to Glasgow a couple of months ago. I remember vividly the conversation the two blokes next to me had:
"Wanna head up the bookies?"
"What fitba's on?"
"Some Eastern European shite"
"Aye, I'll come. But I'm only spending 50 this time"
I am an excellent predictor of results. I am, however, a terrible better. I am too programmed to follow the old adage 'knowledge is power' . I spend ages debating, analysing, pontificating on each bet. I will know at least a little about each and every one of the obscure 'Eastern European shite' teams. And this will stop me betting on them.
What kind of a person can so blithly throw money at things they don't have the slightest clue about? If you win, it's not through your knowledge or ability. Those are two things that I need to use to feel satified when betting because I am, in short, a narcissistic ego-maniac (I do have some nicer qualities).
And it is not reckless, or brave or free-spirited either. I applaud these traits more than most, but when I feel reckless, or brave or free-spirited with my money I go out and get absolutely pissed on one pound vodkas, or buy stupid trainers meant for black people, or watch Scotland play.
It is almost as if people now bet simply because the opportunity is there, handed to them on a plate by hundreds of TV adverts and internet pop-ups. I went to look at my Fantasy Football team earlier today (which obviously exists to prove my knowledge and fuel my ego) and I ended up with 3 separate SkyBet pop-ups tarnishing my screen, shouting at me.
This piece hasn't really gone anywhere, and for that I apologise. I just felt like saying all this, as isn't that what a blog is for? Normal, objective anaylsis and opinion will resume again soon I promise.
Normal, objective analysis and opinion to resume 16/12/10 - 2/1
Normal, objective analysis and opinion to resume 17/12/10 - 11/5
Normal, obective analysis and opinion to never, ever return - 3/14
I'm Ray Winstone. Bet on the next letter Graeme types!!! For "A" 7/1. For "B" 13/1...
GM
Tuesday 14 December 2010
The RedZone: Week 14 in the NFL
Ryan's Top 5 - a cock-up special
In a week where a lot of big teams had things go horribly wrong for them, I thought it'd be nice to celebrate ineptitude for a change, mainly because I'm hungover and feel vindictive (Graeme will know precisely where I was on a Monday night!) - here's the very worst of Week 14:
5. Mile High D Crashes back down to earth - Denver are terrible. This has been long-established and Coach McDaniels paid the price last week. Their defense hasn't functioned without Elvis Dumervil, and their running game (or lack of it) has led to Kyle Orton having to resort to desperate throws to make plays. The final nail in the coffin came against the equally rubbish Arizona Cardinals, who ran out 43-13 winners, despite being led by rookie John Skelton. The Broncos got done on a fake field goal run for a TD by Jay Feely, only the fourth time a kicker has ever rushed for a TD. For shame!
4. Schaub chokes after comeback - this has been a season of fine margins for the Texans. Sadly, they have lost many of the key moments which have landed them at 5-8 after a 34-28 OT defeat to Baltimore. Which was impressive enough when you consider they started the 3rd quarter 28-7 down. Matt Schaub threw for 393 yards, targetting Andre Johnson before delivering the final strike to Jacoby Jones for the tying two-point conversion. Before promptly throwing a pick six to Josh Wilson to end the game.
3. Aaron Rodgers' concussion - Green Bay have struggled to stay in the playoff picture all season. So a trip to Detroit, shorn of Kyle VandenBosch, was exactly what their injury-stricken offense needed. Until their star QB got knocked out of the game in the first half and replaced by the not-so-stellar Matt Flynn. In the battle of the backups, Lions 3rd QB Drew Stanton had the last laugh as the game ended 7-3. Should Rodgers be unable to play next week, you might as well count the Packers out of contention, such is the strength of the NFC South and East.
2. The Redskins' 5th down PAT nightmare - confusion reigned at FedEx Field as the field marker read 1st down, whilst the broadcasters had it 2nd & 1. When McNabb threw to Santana Moss to take his side within a point of Tampa Bay, everyone assumed they'd got a TD on 5th down. They hadn't, the host broadcaster just screwed up! It didn't matter anyway as the PAT snap slipped through Hunter Smith's hands, denying the wayward Graham Gano (the NFL's second Scottish kicker) the chance to tie things up. The shoe could have been on the other foot after LaGarette Blount's goalline fumble, but the Bucs ran out 17-16 victors.
1. Everything that happened to the Minnesota Vikings this week - and I thought the snow was bad in Edinburgh! Such was the weight of the stuff, that the Metrodome's roof caved in, necessitating a quick move to Motown for the matchup against the Giants. Brett Favre's starting streak ended at 297, leaving T-Jax to throw picks in his absence. Which he did, until he then got injured. Eli also struggled, but the 1-2 punch of Brandon and Bradshaw struck again to seal a comfortable 21-3 win. The Vikings, sans homefield advantage, looked distracted. And who can blame them?
In a week where a lot of big teams had things go horribly wrong for them, I thought it'd be nice to celebrate ineptitude for a change, mainly because I'm hungover and feel vindictive (Graeme will know precisely where I was on a Monday night!) - here's the very worst of Week 14:
5. Mile High D Crashes back down to earth - Denver are terrible. This has been long-established and Coach McDaniels paid the price last week. Their defense hasn't functioned without Elvis Dumervil, and their running game (or lack of it) has led to Kyle Orton having to resort to desperate throws to make plays. The final nail in the coffin came against the equally rubbish Arizona Cardinals, who ran out 43-13 winners, despite being led by rookie John Skelton. The Broncos got done on a fake field goal run for a TD by Jay Feely, only the fourth time a kicker has ever rushed for a TD. For shame!
4. Schaub chokes after comeback - this has been a season of fine margins for the Texans. Sadly, they have lost many of the key moments which have landed them at 5-8 after a 34-28 OT defeat to Baltimore. Which was impressive enough when you consider they started the 3rd quarter 28-7 down. Matt Schaub threw for 393 yards, targetting Andre Johnson before delivering the final strike to Jacoby Jones for the tying two-point conversion. Before promptly throwing a pick six to Josh Wilson to end the game.
3. Aaron Rodgers' concussion - Green Bay have struggled to stay in the playoff picture all season. So a trip to Detroit, shorn of Kyle VandenBosch, was exactly what their injury-stricken offense needed. Until their star QB got knocked out of the game in the first half and replaced by the not-so-stellar Matt Flynn. In the battle of the backups, Lions 3rd QB Drew Stanton had the last laugh as the game ended 7-3. Should Rodgers be unable to play next week, you might as well count the Packers out of contention, such is the strength of the NFC South and East.
2. The Redskins' 5th down PAT nightmare - confusion reigned at FedEx Field as the field marker read 1st down, whilst the broadcasters had it 2nd & 1. When McNabb threw to Santana Moss to take his side within a point of Tampa Bay, everyone assumed they'd got a TD on 5th down. They hadn't, the host broadcaster just screwed up! It didn't matter anyway as the PAT snap slipped through Hunter Smith's hands, denying the wayward Graham Gano (the NFL's second Scottish kicker) the chance to tie things up. The shoe could have been on the other foot after LaGarette Blount's goalline fumble, but the Bucs ran out 17-16 victors.
1. Everything that happened to the Minnesota Vikings this week - and I thought the snow was bad in Edinburgh! Such was the weight of the stuff, that the Metrodome's roof caved in, necessitating a quick move to Motown for the matchup against the Giants. Brett Favre's starting streak ended at 297, leaving T-Jax to throw picks in his absence. Which he did, until he then got injured. Eli also struggled, but the 1-2 punch of Brandon and Bradshaw struck again to seal a comfortable 21-3 win. The Vikings, sans homefield advantage, looked distracted. And who can blame them?
Wednesday 8 December 2010
Pardew? Won't Do!
I went to bed last night with Martin and Martin on my mind (Jol and O'Neill of course).
I woke up to find Alan.
(Alan Pardew, not the Braga superstar Alan who would have been an infinately cooler choice)
The sacking of Chris Hughton, as Ryan has covered, was a disrespectful blow to a faithful servant of the club. The only way the Newcastle board could make up for their behaviour was to have a genuine big name boss lined up to take the reins. One can forgive a bit of over-ambition after all.
But we ended up getting Alan.
I am not a Newcastle fan, but I know a few souls that are. And I wouldn't wish having Mike Ashley as an owner on any of them. By hiring Pardew, he has slighted and screwed over a decent manager and has been completely hypocritical and unjustifiable in the process.
Pardew is not a good manager. If he was then, frankly, he wouldn't have had to take a job in League 1 (I know Southampton overpaid, but even so). In fact, his career path is pretty much identical to that of Hughton. He took an understrength West Ham team recovering from a devastating relegation back to the Premiership. He started well enough and even reached an FA Cup final, but things slipped a bit and he got the sack.
His time at Charlton was a failure; they went down and stayed there. He was dismissed from Southampton after he clashed with the board and brought 'chronic low morale' to the team.
The first part of both Pardew and Hughton's sagas mirror each other. They were both able to unite a team devoid of the stars of previous years and take them to promotion. They both proved that they can win at the highest level.
Newcastle's only reasoning for sacking Hughton was to bring in a 'more experienced manager'. Well, Pardew is more experienced than Hughton. And what does his experience tell us?
It shows that he is washed up. Finished. I'm sorry, but if Pardew has not had success at the highest level for over 5 years then he is not going to have any now. Otherwise, he would already have a Premier League job.
Hughton is still an unknown entity because he has been given none of the chances that Pardew got at West Ham. Pardew took the Hammers to the FA Cup final. What is to say for sure that Hughton could not have accomplished something similar with Newcastle this year, or the next?
The whole 'experienced' criteria is evidently a joke. Why not get Brian Laws, so 'experienced' after Burnley's pathetic capitulation. Or find out whether Big Ron is available. Or Peter Reid, or Dick Campbell (a joke for the Scottish lower league fan(s) out their)?
And how is Hughton ever going to get experience if every team he is managing sacks him for the lack of it?
I don't normally give any weight to conspiracy theories or idle tabloid speculation, but the stories suggesting the real reasoning behind Mike Ashley's decision seem too true to be made up. As the rumours go, Ashley wanted a more high profile manager that would draw in Sky Sports reporters and get Newcastle matches broadcast more often. He wanted, basically, to stroke his own sizeable ego. And perhaps his gargantuan belly.
The only consolation for Hughton is that I and anyone else with a brain are mocking Pardew's appointment. Big Fat Mike has evidently failed miserably again. And everbody knows it.
GM
I woke up to find Alan.
(Alan Pardew, not the Braga superstar Alan who would have been an infinately cooler choice)
The sacking of Chris Hughton, as Ryan has covered, was a disrespectful blow to a faithful servant of the club. The only way the Newcastle board could make up for their behaviour was to have a genuine big name boss lined up to take the reins. One can forgive a bit of over-ambition after all.
But we ended up getting Alan.
I am not a Newcastle fan, but I know a few souls that are. And I wouldn't wish having Mike Ashley as an owner on any of them. By hiring Pardew, he has slighted and screwed over a decent manager and has been completely hypocritical and unjustifiable in the process.
Pardew is not a good manager. If he was then, frankly, he wouldn't have had to take a job in League 1 (I know Southampton overpaid, but even so). In fact, his career path is pretty much identical to that of Hughton. He took an understrength West Ham team recovering from a devastating relegation back to the Premiership. He started well enough and even reached an FA Cup final, but things slipped a bit and he got the sack.
His time at Charlton was a failure; they went down and stayed there. He was dismissed from Southampton after he clashed with the board and brought 'chronic low morale' to the team.
The first part of both Pardew and Hughton's sagas mirror each other. They were both able to unite a team devoid of the stars of previous years and take them to promotion. They both proved that they can win at the highest level.
Newcastle's only reasoning for sacking Hughton was to bring in a 'more experienced manager'. Well, Pardew is more experienced than Hughton. And what does his experience tell us?
It shows that he is washed up. Finished. I'm sorry, but if Pardew has not had success at the highest level for over 5 years then he is not going to have any now. Otherwise, he would already have a Premier League job.
Hughton is still an unknown entity because he has been given none of the chances that Pardew got at West Ham. Pardew took the Hammers to the FA Cup final. What is to say for sure that Hughton could not have accomplished something similar with Newcastle this year, or the next?
The whole 'experienced' criteria is evidently a joke. Why not get Brian Laws, so 'experienced' after Burnley's pathetic capitulation. Or find out whether Big Ron is available. Or Peter Reid, or Dick Campbell (a joke for the Scottish lower league fan(s) out their)?
And how is Hughton ever going to get experience if every team he is managing sacks him for the lack of it?
I don't normally give any weight to conspiracy theories or idle tabloid speculation, but the stories suggesting the real reasoning behind Mike Ashley's decision seem too true to be made up. As the rumours go, Ashley wanted a more high profile manager that would draw in Sky Sports reporters and get Newcastle matches broadcast more often. He wanted, basically, to stroke his own sizeable ego. And perhaps his gargantuan belly.
The only consolation for Hughton is that I and anyone else with a brain are mocking Pardew's appointment. Big Fat Mike has evidently failed miserably again. And everbody knows it.
GM
Tuesday 7 December 2010
Home And Away - The Ashes Tour: The 2nd Test
England rejoices, Australia despairs. Any Barmy Army supporter will have revelled in every single moment of the Adelaide test match and, to be honest, my words can't really add to what has been said before and can't do justice to how good the English performance was (and how bad the Aussies were!). But then, I'm self-indulgent, so I'm going to do it anyway:
2nd Test (Adelaide) - England 620-5d (Pietersen 227, Cook 148, Trott 78, Bell 68*) beat Australia 245 (Hussey 93, Haddin 56, Watson 51, Anderson 4-51) and 304 (Clarke 80, Watson 57, Hussey 52, Swann 5-91) by an innings and 71 runs.
I felt it was all quite symbolic!
RM
2nd Test (Adelaide) - England 620-5d (Pietersen 227, Cook 148, Trott 78, Bell 68*) beat Australia 245 (Hussey 93, Haddin 56, Watson 51, Anderson 4-51) and 304 (Clarke 80, Watson 57, Hussey 52, Swann 5-91) by an innings and 71 runs.
- England close 1st innings on 1-0. The most dramatic start possible to a Test match, with Australia, having won the toss and batted on a good-looking pitch, 2-3 at the start of the 3rd over. The collapse was catalysed by a shocking piece of running from a clearly injured Simon Katich, although England's fielding was spot on. Skipper Ponting followed with a perfectly pitched delivery from James Anderson, finding just enough movement to vex Punter. A fair recovery was mounted, although not without incident as England continued to keep the pressure on their esteemed hosts. Steve Finn was loose, but picked up the crucial wicket of Marcus North to spark a second collapse. Brad Haddin's counterattack was admirable but shortlived as a Stuart Broad bouncer did its job for a change. To bowl a side out at Adelaide on Day 1 is no mean feat and is equal testiment to England's control as it is Australia's lack of quality. England 1 Australia 0
- England close 1st innings on 317-2. Oh no, not again, thought all England fans as Andrew Strauss left the third ball of the day and was bowled by Doug the Rug. A repeat of Brisbane's disappointing first innings effort. No such thing. Alastair Cook continued to look like he was never going to get out and displayed a stunning array of shots. Ditto Jonathan Trott, until he tried his trademark flick off the pads and popped it straight to Michael Clarke. Kevin Pietersen ensured no let-up and played his way back into form and ended up 85* overnight. England 2 Australia 0
- England close 1st innings on 551-4. KP IS BACK! And in such imperious fashion. No ton for almost two years, then he dismantles a beleagured bowling attack, including his nemesis the left-arm spinner. Poor old Xavier Doherty couldn't control his line or length and so Pietersen latched onto him, including one monstrous straight six. The other bowlers tried to bounce him and got dispatched and could not deliver balls to the 7-2 field that Ponting had set for them. KP simply waited for them to drift into the pads and stepped across to flick them to mid-wicket. It was hilarious to watch as an England fan. Only Ryan Harris can hold his head up, bowling a couple of hostile spells and finally dismissing Cook. The rain saved the hosts from further punishment. England 3 Australia 0
- Australia close 2nd innings on 238-4. For my money, England should have declared overnight, but they batted on at quite a rate, with Ian Bell continuing to look in the form of his life, even though he hasn't been required to be at his best thus far. Surprisingly, Australia continued the aggressive rate as Anderson failed to find the same penetration as first time around. Fortunately, Simon Katich is a left-hander, which left him at the mercy of Graeme Swann. 3 down after tea, there came a bit of a lull in proceedings as Clarke and Hussey battled to save the test. And could well have done so. Until, of all people, Pietersen struck with the last ball of the day to dismiss Clarke. England 3.5 Australia 0.5
- Australia close 2nd innings 304. England win the test and go 1-0 up in the series. A terrific bowling performance as England wrapped things up in 90 minutes. Swann found massive turn with the new ball and went through his variations beautifully to pick up another 5fer. Anderson struck back after an expensive start, trapping poor old Ryan Harris for a king pair. Sadly, Stuart Broad pulled up with a stomach muscle injury the day before and is out of the tour. I'd pick Tremlett to replace him, such will be the pace and bounce in the Perth pitch. As for Oz, Katich is hurt and will be replaced by Phil Hughes. Doherty's Test career is over already and may be replaced by Nathan Hauritz or Steve Smith. Marcus North and Doug Bollinger are also said to be under pressure for their place. How much change can Australia afford to make without causing complete upheavel. Can they afford to write off the series that makes so much to the people in order to bring through a new batch of Test cricketers, if there are indeed guys good enough to cope at the top. England 4.5 Australia 0.5
I felt it was all quite symbolic!
RM
The RedZone: Week 13 in the NFL
Ryan's Top 5 - a Running Back Special
There were so many outstanding performances from the backfield this week that I felt it would be an idea to focus on that position and let Graeme pick up on the other efforts of the week.
5. Steven Jackson - 28 carries, 102 yards, 1 TD; 1 catch, 13 yards. In a game low on offensive quality (the Cardinals were involved after all), Jackson stood high above the rest as the Rams continued on their way to an unlikely NFC West title in Sam Bradford's rookie season. The fact is that they actually have the best offensive line in the division right now and as such both Bradford (although not in ths game) and Jackson are able to make big plays, such as the 27-yard TD run which sealed the deal in a 19-6 win.
4. Chris Ivory - 15 carries, 117 yards, 2 TD's. Reggie Bush may have returned, but undrafted rookie Ivory has become the featured back for the Saints in the continued absence of Pierre Thomas. And boy, was his power and speed needed in a game against the Bengals which was not expected to be as close as it turned out. The fact that their hot offense is beginning to take on a more rounded shape is pretty ominous for the rest of the league heading into the postseason. The Saints continue to look good for a wildcard spot with a 34-30 victory.
3. Tashard Choice - 19 carries, 100 yards, 1 TD. In many ways, Choice is the man who best sums up the Cowboys' season. It was he who was stripped by DeAngelo Hall in the Week 1 matchup against the Redskins as it turned out that Dallas were not all they were cracked up to be. And yet he bounced back in style with Marion Barber out and Felix Jones continuing to underwhelm. An early TD and continued big plays set up the defense to pick Peyton Manning and the Colts 4 times as they chased the game. They forced overtime, then fell 38-35 thanks to a David Buhler FG.
2. Adrian Peterson - 16 carries, 107 yards, 3 TD's; 1 catch, 1 yard. It was only the Bills, but circumstances are everything. Brett Favre was knocked out on the first play of the game, leaving Tarvaris Jackson to run the offense. Who was skittish at best. Yet Peterson, who was questionable all week with an ankle knock, showed no ill effects, particularly on a vibrant 43-yard TD run in the 4th quarter. Sidney Rice was also a big factor in the Vikings' 38-14 success.
1. The Giants' 1-2 Punch: Brandon Jacobs - 8 carries, 103 yards, 2 TD's; Ahmad Bradshaw - 25 carries, 97 yards, 2 TD's; 1 catch, 8 yards. The Redskins have fallen apart in almost every sense. Their defense has not benefitted from the switch to 3-4 and now Albert Haynesworth has been suspended. Both these backs have been vying for a starting spot all season as Tom Coughlin looks to use his varied weapons as much as possible to back up Eli. Jacobs is the wrecking ball, Bradshaw the more manoevurable, but the results are pretty much the same
Credit also to: LaGarette Blount, Maurice Jones-Drew and Marshawn Lynch. However, the best play of the week (not by a RB) was by Carolina punter Jason Baker, who pulled out a spectacular tap tackle on Leon Washington just as he held the ball up for what would have been an 86-yard return TD. LAD!
Graeme's Top 5
I think my Top 5 this week became a bit of a lineman special. I also have no qualms about putting Jason Baker in at number 5, because the tackle he made was simply one of the best I have ever seen in any sport by any player.
5. Jason Baker - The ankle tap is an incredibly difficult tackle to pull off. In my experience playing rugby, it is as much down to good angles and luck as technique. Needless to say, I don't pull it off that often! So for a punter to get all three of these things right is outstanding. To be honest, just watch it: http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/other_sports/american_football/9261006.stm
It's not his fault that his Panthers team is so shit, and he doesn't mind much because he gets to punt more and show off!
4. Raiders' D - San Diego held to 21 rushing yards, 13 points, 1 TD - The Chargers offense has been lethal this year, but Oakland were up for the challenge. The defensive line disrupted the San Diego running game, which has of late been providing some balance to the Chargers' pass dominated play. With nothing to fall back on, Rivers was sacked 4 times and was unable to get anything going. The context of this game was also important; the Raiders went to San Diego and came away with their playoff chances still alive. In doing so, they have put San Diego in trouble that can only be compared to the trouble Ron Burgandy and Veronica Corningstone were in stuck in the Bear Pit prior to the News Team showing up.
3. Cowboys' O-Line - 217 yards rushing, John Kitna not sacked! - The rushing totals were impressive, but to get John Kitna through a game against Dwight Freeney and Robert Mathis without as much as a scratch is impressive. Kitna was even able to gain 28 of those rushing yards by himself. And he's as fast as continental drift.
2. Patriots' O-Line - The Jets were run out of Foxboro in shame after being thrashed 45-3 in front of the entire nation of America and whoever stayed up to watch it at 2am elsewhere. This victory was priceless. It established the Pats at the top of the AFC East and wiped the smile off Rex Ryan's smug, fat face. It aslo demonstrated the continuing effectiveness of New England's offensive lineman. Up against the most hyped D in the NFL, Brady was not thrown off his rhythm and the Pats were able to go on long drives, convert third downs and run the ball for 5+ yard gains with consistency.
1. Tom Brady - 21/29, 326 yards, 4 TD's, 0 INT's - This must rank as one of Brady's best regular season games. Fine, as number 2 this week shows, the O-Line was outstanding but time in the pocket or not Brady still had to go to work against the best pass defence in the league, including a fit again Darrelle Revis. 11 first downs, 4 TD's and no mistakes of any kind. MVP?
GM and RM
There were so many outstanding performances from the backfield this week that I felt it would be an idea to focus on that position and let Graeme pick up on the other efforts of the week.
5. Steven Jackson - 28 carries, 102 yards, 1 TD; 1 catch, 13 yards. In a game low on offensive quality (the Cardinals were involved after all), Jackson stood high above the rest as the Rams continued on their way to an unlikely NFC West title in Sam Bradford's rookie season. The fact is that they actually have the best offensive line in the division right now and as such both Bradford (although not in ths game) and Jackson are able to make big plays, such as the 27-yard TD run which sealed the deal in a 19-6 win.
4. Chris Ivory - 15 carries, 117 yards, 2 TD's. Reggie Bush may have returned, but undrafted rookie Ivory has become the featured back for the Saints in the continued absence of Pierre Thomas. And boy, was his power and speed needed in a game against the Bengals which was not expected to be as close as it turned out. The fact that their hot offense is beginning to take on a more rounded shape is pretty ominous for the rest of the league heading into the postseason. The Saints continue to look good for a wildcard spot with a 34-30 victory.
3. Tashard Choice - 19 carries, 100 yards, 1 TD. In many ways, Choice is the man who best sums up the Cowboys' season. It was he who was stripped by DeAngelo Hall in the Week 1 matchup against the Redskins as it turned out that Dallas were not all they were cracked up to be. And yet he bounced back in style with Marion Barber out and Felix Jones continuing to underwhelm. An early TD and continued big plays set up the defense to pick Peyton Manning and the Colts 4 times as they chased the game. They forced overtime, then fell 38-35 thanks to a David Buhler FG.
2. Adrian Peterson - 16 carries, 107 yards, 3 TD's; 1 catch, 1 yard. It was only the Bills, but circumstances are everything. Brett Favre was knocked out on the first play of the game, leaving Tarvaris Jackson to run the offense. Who was skittish at best. Yet Peterson, who was questionable all week with an ankle knock, showed no ill effects, particularly on a vibrant 43-yard TD run in the 4th quarter. Sidney Rice was also a big factor in the Vikings' 38-14 success.
1. The Giants' 1-2 Punch: Brandon Jacobs - 8 carries, 103 yards, 2 TD's; Ahmad Bradshaw - 25 carries, 97 yards, 2 TD's; 1 catch, 8 yards. The Redskins have fallen apart in almost every sense. Their defense has not benefitted from the switch to 3-4 and now Albert Haynesworth has been suspended. Both these backs have been vying for a starting spot all season as Tom Coughlin looks to use his varied weapons as much as possible to back up Eli. Jacobs is the wrecking ball, Bradshaw the more manoevurable, but the results are pretty much the same
Credit also to: LaGarette Blount, Maurice Jones-Drew and Marshawn Lynch. However, the best play of the week (not by a RB) was by Carolina punter Jason Baker, who pulled out a spectacular tap tackle on Leon Washington just as he held the ball up for what would have been an 86-yard return TD. LAD!
Graeme's Top 5
I think my Top 5 this week became a bit of a lineman special. I also have no qualms about putting Jason Baker in at number 5, because the tackle he made was simply one of the best I have ever seen in any sport by any player.
5. Jason Baker - The ankle tap is an incredibly difficult tackle to pull off. In my experience playing rugby, it is as much down to good angles and luck as technique. Needless to say, I don't pull it off that often! So for a punter to get all three of these things right is outstanding. To be honest, just watch it: http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/other_sports/american_football/9261006.stm
It's not his fault that his Panthers team is so shit, and he doesn't mind much because he gets to punt more and show off!
4. Raiders' D - San Diego held to 21 rushing yards, 13 points, 1 TD - The Chargers offense has been lethal this year, but Oakland were up for the challenge. The defensive line disrupted the San Diego running game, which has of late been providing some balance to the Chargers' pass dominated play. With nothing to fall back on, Rivers was sacked 4 times and was unable to get anything going. The context of this game was also important; the Raiders went to San Diego and came away with their playoff chances still alive. In doing so, they have put San Diego in trouble that can only be compared to the trouble Ron Burgandy and Veronica Corningstone were in stuck in the Bear Pit prior to the News Team showing up.
3. Cowboys' O-Line - 217 yards rushing, John Kitna not sacked! - The rushing totals were impressive, but to get John Kitna through a game against Dwight Freeney and Robert Mathis without as much as a scratch is impressive. Kitna was even able to gain 28 of those rushing yards by himself. And he's as fast as continental drift.
2. Patriots' O-Line - The Jets were run out of Foxboro in shame after being thrashed 45-3 in front of the entire nation of America and whoever stayed up to watch it at 2am elsewhere. This victory was priceless. It established the Pats at the top of the AFC East and wiped the smile off Rex Ryan's smug, fat face. It aslo demonstrated the continuing effectiveness of New England's offensive lineman. Up against the most hyped D in the NFL, Brady was not thrown off his rhythm and the Pats were able to go on long drives, convert third downs and run the ball for 5+ yard gains with consistency.
1. Tom Brady - 21/29, 326 yards, 4 TD's, 0 INT's - This must rank as one of Brady's best regular season games. Fine, as number 2 this week shows, the O-Line was outstanding but time in the pocket or not Brady still had to go to work against the best pass defence in the league, including a fit again Darrelle Revis. 11 first downs, 4 TD's and no mistakes of any kind. MVP?
GM and RM
Monday 6 December 2010
And What Thanks Do I Get? The Chris Hughton Story
There are some football teams who just always seem to create headlines. Newcastle United is one of those. Just at a time when they seemed to be re-establishing themselves as a side in the Premier League, albeit not quite back to the glory days under Kevin Keegan (the first time round), they release the man who can claim most credit for their rehabilitation. Chris Hughton is gone, a late first casualty of the Premier League season. His position was thought to be under scrutiny several weeks ago, but this was thought to have been resolved with talks of a contract extension. However, the board have seemingly changed their mind and I can't for the life of me work out why!
Hughton joined the Magpies under the ill-starred second spell of Messiah Keegan himself and cut a fairly anonymous figure as KK proved once and for all that he really had very little managerial nous whatsoever. And eventually took temporary charge when Kev got the chop, before being ousted for a so-called "bigger manager", in this case literally as Joe Kinnear rolled into town, despite having had no top flight experience in the previous 8 years or so! Hughton hadn't done a bad job but seemingly lacked the necessary experience. Kinnear's heart eventually gave way again, so into the breach stepped the willing Hughton, only to be ousted by the second incarnation of the Geordie Messiah, Alan Shearer. He who makes the fat topless men in the Gallowgate End weep with joy, whilst the rest of us weep with boredom during his post-match interviews. At least it kept him off Match of the Day for a bit. Sadly, his tenure also kept Newcastle off MOTD for the next season. After a summer of umm-ing and ah-ing, Big Al decided that he didn't want the job and seemingly neither did anyone else. Who do you think Mike Ashley and co turned to in their hour of need?
And so Hughton landed the job permanently down in the Championship, with a squad shorn of the greats such as Shearer, Shay Given and Nobby Solano, who had made the side so watchable and effective over the years. Instead, he had to work with a young team, mainly homegrown and mainly in his own image i.e. completely unknown to everyone outside Tyneside. These youngsters were interspersed with players such as Alan Smith, Kevin Nolan and Joey Barton, so talented once upon a time but seemingly having missed the boat at Premier League level. And my goodness, how this side responded to its critics. Nolan in particular was an inspiration to the young guns and they shot straight back up, the generall morbidly obese faithful grateful for the work the Hughton had done. However, Ashley's hands were tied in the summer by his continued attempts to sell the club. Hughton could not really add to his squad and so the side were tipped to drop straight back down.
And whilst they have been fairly inconsistent this season, they've never come close to being troubled. Hughton's side have created memories this season which will live fondly in the hearts of those who have been starved of any kind of good for a long time now. Think of the 6-0 demolition of Villa, the win at the Emirates, and especially the derby day destruction of Sunderland, Kevin Nolan again instrumental in a side punching well above its weight. Whilst the haven't won in a month, falling to a 3-1 defeat to West Brom yesterday, expectations need to be managed. For once at St James' Park, the fans knew where they stood. It was the board who got it all wrong.
The statement coming out of Newcastle United today was one of goodwill and gratitude towards Hughton. Empty words in my opinion. The statement goes on to say it wanted someone with "more managerial experience". This is utter nonsense. Hughton has worked with this group of players for two-and-a-half years and knows them better than anyone. He has managed to get the best out of "dodgy" characters such as Barton and Andy Carroll, both of whom cite Hughton as a positive influence on their careers. Where are the better alternatives? Martin O'Neill won't want it, Alan Curbishley would be a disaster. Gianfranco Zola, great man, even less experienced than Hughton. Sven? You see my point. Hughton has been mistreated and deserves far more credit for the work he has done with this side, who will now struggle in his absence.
I hope he gets another top level post soon. It'll probably be the Wigan job!
RM
Hughton joined the Magpies under the ill-starred second spell of Messiah Keegan himself and cut a fairly anonymous figure as KK proved once and for all that he really had very little managerial nous whatsoever. And eventually took temporary charge when Kev got the chop, before being ousted for a so-called "bigger manager", in this case literally as Joe Kinnear rolled into town, despite having had no top flight experience in the previous 8 years or so! Hughton hadn't done a bad job but seemingly lacked the necessary experience. Kinnear's heart eventually gave way again, so into the breach stepped the willing Hughton, only to be ousted by the second incarnation of the Geordie Messiah, Alan Shearer. He who makes the fat topless men in the Gallowgate End weep with joy, whilst the rest of us weep with boredom during his post-match interviews. At least it kept him off Match of the Day for a bit. Sadly, his tenure also kept Newcastle off MOTD for the next season. After a summer of umm-ing and ah-ing, Big Al decided that he didn't want the job and seemingly neither did anyone else. Who do you think Mike Ashley and co turned to in their hour of need?
And so Hughton landed the job permanently down in the Championship, with a squad shorn of the greats such as Shearer, Shay Given and Nobby Solano, who had made the side so watchable and effective over the years. Instead, he had to work with a young team, mainly homegrown and mainly in his own image i.e. completely unknown to everyone outside Tyneside. These youngsters were interspersed with players such as Alan Smith, Kevin Nolan and Joey Barton, so talented once upon a time but seemingly having missed the boat at Premier League level. And my goodness, how this side responded to its critics. Nolan in particular was an inspiration to the young guns and they shot straight back up, the generall morbidly obese faithful grateful for the work the Hughton had done. However, Ashley's hands were tied in the summer by his continued attempts to sell the club. Hughton could not really add to his squad and so the side were tipped to drop straight back down.
And whilst they have been fairly inconsistent this season, they've never come close to being troubled. Hughton's side have created memories this season which will live fondly in the hearts of those who have been starved of any kind of good for a long time now. Think of the 6-0 demolition of Villa, the win at the Emirates, and especially the derby day destruction of Sunderland, Kevin Nolan again instrumental in a side punching well above its weight. Whilst the haven't won in a month, falling to a 3-1 defeat to West Brom yesterday, expectations need to be managed. For once at St James' Park, the fans knew where they stood. It was the board who got it all wrong.
The statement coming out of Newcastle United today was one of goodwill and gratitude towards Hughton. Empty words in my opinion. The statement goes on to say it wanted someone with "more managerial experience". This is utter nonsense. Hughton has worked with this group of players for two-and-a-half years and knows them better than anyone. He has managed to get the best out of "dodgy" characters such as Barton and Andy Carroll, both of whom cite Hughton as a positive influence on their careers. Where are the better alternatives? Martin O'Neill won't want it, Alan Curbishley would be a disaster. Gianfranco Zola, great man, even less experienced than Hughton. Sven? You see my point. Hughton has been mistreated and deserves far more credit for the work he has done with this side, who will now struggle in his absence.
I hope he gets another top level post soon. It'll probably be the Wigan job!
RM
Friday 3 December 2010
Told you so...
High and unfounded expectation will only ever end in disappointment and indignation. Such were the conflicting emotions impacting upon the England 2018 World Cup bid team at around 3:15pm in Zurich yesterday afternoon. So convinced were they that they possessed the greatest infrastructure and financial package to host the planet's biggest sporting event, that they failed to spot some massive fundamental flaws in both their overall bid and the way they presented themselves on the day. And, perhaps more importantly, they underestimated the merits of their opposing bids. You heard it on Beyond the Cliche first that Russia were going to win the right to host the World Cup. Yet the British media had written them off as underdogs in light of Vladimir Putin's absence. What sort of a reason is that to disregard the hard work the Russians put in?
Let's go through the bid presentations as a way of explaining my point. England attempted to convey their excitement through the slogan "England United. The World Invited". When you think of a nation invited, you would think the best way to demonstrate this would be to present the bid using individuals from all walks of life. Who did England choose? A member of the royal family and the prime minister (an Old Etonian). And a bloke who was a former gang member who has reinvented himself through community work for Manchester City. In short, the highest of the high and someone who rose up from the lowest of the low. No happy medium. Prince William speech was stilted and his joke about England's ability to host big events being convenient, "As I'm planning a rather big one myself next year" went down like a lead balloon. One poor bloke laughed. Just one. David Cameron did fine but treated it a bit too much like a political speech, thrusting fist and all, and lacked true football passion and knowledge. Maybe I was just irked because they were referred to as "Future King of England" and "Prime Minister of England". IT'S THE UK! Why conveniently ignore Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland?
Then there is the key battleground - David Beckham vs Andrei Arshavin. Both have been described by various media sources as "emotive speeches". And yet Arshavin's managed to display the effect that football could have on the people of Russia, citing himself as an example, as opposed to Beckham, who told the FIFA delegates in detail how great his his grandfather was. My preference towards Arshavin was confirmed when he described himself as a "simple footballer" in a style reminiscent of a certain meerkat. Not intentional, but still - what a lad!
England's bid was further dented by their promotional videos, which were just pure shite! They had a video filled with lots of words and cartoons about how great the World Cup was going to be. Not all the FIFA delegates will read perfect English and there was no concept of how the 2018 competition would look on these shores. Unlike the Russians, who gave a virtual fly-past of their main stadiums, the emphasis on the soul of the nation. And indeed the Iberian joint bid, which listed a load of statistics, albeit in a live setting. England's other video showed some Premier League all-stars, with fans over the world watching. Basically the message was this - we're the best, accept no other imitations. This arrogance was constantly fuelled by the media, who at the same time tried to drive the bid into the ground with scandal and bribery and back-biting. The FIFA delegates are a proud bunch. You question their integrity, you've got nae chance. We really should have all seen it coming.
So Russia in 2018, I'm happy with. I think it's a football-crazy environment, with a developing side and a chance to take a nation forward with the infrastructure the World Cup will provide. Don't get me started on Qatar 2022. True, the proposed stadiums look amazing. And yet they are all within a 60km radius. Part of the beauty of this competition is the different characters each host city brings. If they're all within a stone's throw, that will be lost. And where is Qatar's football pedigree. No-one knows any player ever to play for Qatar and where they sit in the world standings (other than the fact it's low, lower even than Wales). We all know they'll be battered and knocked out in the group stages. And then there's this concept of recycling the stadiums and flogging them off to Third World countries. Believe me when I say it won't happen.
Maybe someone will prove me wrong in 12 years' time when Beyond the Cliche is the leading sports blog on the planet. A notion as ridiculous as a Qatari World Cup
RM
Let's go through the bid presentations as a way of explaining my point. England attempted to convey their excitement through the slogan "England United. The World Invited". When you think of a nation invited, you would think the best way to demonstrate this would be to present the bid using individuals from all walks of life. Who did England choose? A member of the royal family and the prime minister (an Old Etonian). And a bloke who was a former gang member who has reinvented himself through community work for Manchester City. In short, the highest of the high and someone who rose up from the lowest of the low. No happy medium. Prince William speech was stilted and his joke about England's ability to host big events being convenient, "As I'm planning a rather big one myself next year" went down like a lead balloon. One poor bloke laughed. Just one. David Cameron did fine but treated it a bit too much like a political speech, thrusting fist and all, and lacked true football passion and knowledge. Maybe I was just irked because they were referred to as "Future King of England" and "Prime Minister of England". IT'S THE UK! Why conveniently ignore Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland?
Then there is the key battleground - David Beckham vs Andrei Arshavin. Both have been described by various media sources as "emotive speeches". And yet Arshavin's managed to display the effect that football could have on the people of Russia, citing himself as an example, as opposed to Beckham, who told the FIFA delegates in detail how great his his grandfather was. My preference towards Arshavin was confirmed when he described himself as a "simple footballer" in a style reminiscent of a certain meerkat. Not intentional, but still - what a lad!
England's bid was further dented by their promotional videos, which were just pure shite! They had a video filled with lots of words and cartoons about how great the World Cup was going to be. Not all the FIFA delegates will read perfect English and there was no concept of how the 2018 competition would look on these shores. Unlike the Russians, who gave a virtual fly-past of their main stadiums, the emphasis on the soul of the nation. And indeed the Iberian joint bid, which listed a load of statistics, albeit in a live setting. England's other video showed some Premier League all-stars, with fans over the world watching. Basically the message was this - we're the best, accept no other imitations. This arrogance was constantly fuelled by the media, who at the same time tried to drive the bid into the ground with scandal and bribery and back-biting. The FIFA delegates are a proud bunch. You question their integrity, you've got nae chance. We really should have all seen it coming.
So Russia in 2018, I'm happy with. I think it's a football-crazy environment, with a developing side and a chance to take a nation forward with the infrastructure the World Cup will provide. Don't get me started on Qatar 2022. True, the proposed stadiums look amazing. And yet they are all within a 60km radius. Part of the beauty of this competition is the different characters each host city brings. If they're all within a stone's throw, that will be lost. And where is Qatar's football pedigree. No-one knows any player ever to play for Qatar and where they sit in the world standings (other than the fact it's low, lower even than Wales). We all know they'll be battered and knocked out in the group stages. And then there's this concept of recycling the stadiums and flogging them off to Third World countries. Believe me when I say it won't happen.
Maybe someone will prove me wrong in 12 years' time when Beyond the Cliche is the leading sports blog on the planet. A notion as ridiculous as a Qatari World Cup
RM
Wednesday 1 December 2010
The Back Page: December 2010
Graeme has already reviewed the moustaches on display in sport for this month. So I've been left with the rest. Thankfully, there have been a number of daft and amusing stories for the month of November, worthy of the prestigious Beyond the Cliche awards:
Waste of money of the month - Anybody who shelled out £14.95 on a Saturday night, thus forsaking the X Factor and Piers Morgan's Life Stories, to watch coverage on Sky Box Office of David Haye's "Superfight" with Audley Harrison. Not a hand laid upon each other for the first two rounds, before Haye's clear superiority shone through in the third and A-Force dropped like a stone. Only my brother's excellent school production kept me from making a similar error of judgement. But then, did we expect anything more of this matchup realistically?
Best fight of the month - Forget boxing, when a couple of NFL players get pissed off, there's more punches thrown in 20 seconds than in 12 whole rounds in the ring. Take Houston's Andre Johnson and Tennessee's Cortland Finnegan for example. And they got fined as much as James Harrison on a roughing the passer call!
Poorest excuse of the month - Having already voiced my displeasure at Phil Taylor's nomination for BBC SPOTY, let me now turn my ire to his blaming a defeat on the pair of glasses he was wearing. It's called ageing Phil. You can't stay at your peak forever. Oh wait, it's darts. You probably can then.
Disappointment of the month - Not to complain too much, you don't get to see your side beat the world champions live! However, I paid good money to see Scotland vs South Africa and at least wanted to shout "BEEEEASTTT!" more than once. Sadly, Tendai Mtawariwa was rubbish and was dominated in the scrum by Euan Murray. Still 21-17 - every cloud and all that...
Sensation of the month - the Sprinkler. Introduced to the world at large by Graeme Swann on the Ashes tour, this move has taken the Edinburgh Student Union by storm. My Facebook friends will be able to see me and my teammates pulling this particular move en masse on a night out (I'm the one in the natty pink shirt!). Swann also showed through his video diary that it is OK to do racist voices to Pakistani members of your team, spin coach Mushtaq Ahmed copping the abuse. Edinburgh University CC breathes a sigh of relief.
Video of the month - www.livingstonfc.co.uk/livitv.php. If you click on Livingston vs Dumbarton match highlights, you can just about make out Graeme sitting glumly on his own in the splendid West Lothian weather as Iain Russell's goal goes in to kill the game!
Relief of the month - Fernando Alonso didn't win the Formula 1 World Championship. I can't stand the guy. And frankly, the Red Bull which Sebastian Vettel steered to victory was comfortably the best car all season long. So congratulations to Vettel.
Cringe of the month - David Cameron's video message to the Ashes squad. Now Dave, you're clearly not John Major, and have demonstrated that you really know nothing about cricket. As for the line "Seeing as Freddie's not here, we may even have a drink" - you'd be a priviliged man indeed to go on the lash with Flintoff. Shame on you for lash avoidance. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9TQPvYpQ1g
My idiot mate of the month - I was watching the Man United vs Rangers game with a typical United fan. In that he was posh, from nowhere near Manchester and doesn't really understand what it's like to be a true fan of the game. During this borefest, he berates Dimitar Berbatov continually, claiming that he's "rubbish and needs to be sold". 3 days later he puts 5 past Blackburn.
Lookalike of the month - the bit I know you all look forward to. Sadly, Graeme has already alluded to Kevin Pietersen's moustache, so my comparison with Dick Dastardly doesn't really cut the mustard - variety is after all the spice of life. I got confused for Gareth Bale at a gig in Glasgow (what would he have been doing there I hear you ask!) but that isn't particularly exciting for our wide following! I even had a lecturer who was the spitting image of Rafa Benitez. So I'll admit to having done a little bit of research on this one (ie Googled "Sporting lookalikes"). I came across one which was too good to ignore. I give you: Marlon Harewood of Blackpool and the Goomba from the live action movie of Mario Bros!
So what sporting fun have we to look forward to in this festive month of December? We can start with plenty of Saturdays doing absolutely nothing as the SFL schedules get wiped out by the already horrendous snowy weather. Ashes Tests 2-4 are much more likely to be played in appropriate conditions. We will finally find out who will host the 2018 World Cup - we all know it should be England but FIFA's pride will mean that it won't be and we'll be left to contemplate a bunch of stereotypes about Russia "rejoining the modern world" for the next 7 years! At least the NFL playoff picture will become clearer, free of any political struggle. What was that about a potential boycott of the 2011 season?
Ah well, it's nearly Christmas!
RM
Waste of money of the month - Anybody who shelled out £14.95 on a Saturday night, thus forsaking the X Factor and Piers Morgan's Life Stories, to watch coverage on Sky Box Office of David Haye's "Superfight" with Audley Harrison. Not a hand laid upon each other for the first two rounds, before Haye's clear superiority shone through in the third and A-Force dropped like a stone. Only my brother's excellent school production kept me from making a similar error of judgement. But then, did we expect anything more of this matchup realistically?
Best fight of the month - Forget boxing, when a couple of NFL players get pissed off, there's more punches thrown in 20 seconds than in 12 whole rounds in the ring. Take Houston's Andre Johnson and Tennessee's Cortland Finnegan for example. And they got fined as much as James Harrison on a roughing the passer call!
Poorest excuse of the month - Having already voiced my displeasure at Phil Taylor's nomination for BBC SPOTY, let me now turn my ire to his blaming a defeat on the pair of glasses he was wearing. It's called ageing Phil. You can't stay at your peak forever. Oh wait, it's darts. You probably can then.
Disappointment of the month - Not to complain too much, you don't get to see your side beat the world champions live! However, I paid good money to see Scotland vs South Africa and at least wanted to shout "BEEEEASTTT!" more than once. Sadly, Tendai Mtawariwa was rubbish and was dominated in the scrum by Euan Murray. Still 21-17 - every cloud and all that...
Sensation of the month - the Sprinkler. Introduced to the world at large by Graeme Swann on the Ashes tour, this move has taken the Edinburgh Student Union by storm. My Facebook friends will be able to see me and my teammates pulling this particular move en masse on a night out (I'm the one in the natty pink shirt!). Swann also showed through his video diary that it is OK to do racist voices to Pakistani members of your team, spin coach Mushtaq Ahmed copping the abuse. Edinburgh University CC breathes a sigh of relief.
Video of the month - www.livingstonfc.co.uk/livitv.php. If you click on Livingston vs Dumbarton match highlights, you can just about make out Graeme sitting glumly on his own in the splendid West Lothian weather as Iain Russell's goal goes in to kill the game!
Relief of the month - Fernando Alonso didn't win the Formula 1 World Championship. I can't stand the guy. And frankly, the Red Bull which Sebastian Vettel steered to victory was comfortably the best car all season long. So congratulations to Vettel.
Cringe of the month - David Cameron's video message to the Ashes squad. Now Dave, you're clearly not John Major, and have demonstrated that you really know nothing about cricket. As for the line "Seeing as Freddie's not here, we may even have a drink" - you'd be a priviliged man indeed to go on the lash with Flintoff. Shame on you for lash avoidance. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9TQPvYpQ1g
My idiot mate of the month - I was watching the Man United vs Rangers game with a typical United fan. In that he was posh, from nowhere near Manchester and doesn't really understand what it's like to be a true fan of the game. During this borefest, he berates Dimitar Berbatov continually, claiming that he's "rubbish and needs to be sold". 3 days later he puts 5 past Blackburn.
Lookalike of the month - the bit I know you all look forward to. Sadly, Graeme has already alluded to Kevin Pietersen's moustache, so my comparison with Dick Dastardly doesn't really cut the mustard - variety is after all the spice of life. I got confused for Gareth Bale at a gig in Glasgow (what would he have been doing there I hear you ask!) but that isn't particularly exciting for our wide following! I even had a lecturer who was the spitting image of Rafa Benitez. So I'll admit to having done a little bit of research on this one (ie Googled "Sporting lookalikes"). I came across one which was too good to ignore. I give you: Marlon Harewood of Blackpool and the Goomba from the live action movie of Mario Bros!
So what sporting fun have we to look forward to in this festive month of December? We can start with plenty of Saturdays doing absolutely nothing as the SFL schedules get wiped out by the already horrendous snowy weather. Ashes Tests 2-4 are much more likely to be played in appropriate conditions. We will finally find out who will host the 2018 World Cup - we all know it should be England but FIFA's pride will mean that it won't be and we'll be left to contemplate a bunch of stereotypes about Russia "rejoining the modern world" for the next 7 years! At least the NFL playoff picture will become clearer, free of any political struggle. What was that about a potential boycott of the 2011 season?
Ah well, it's nearly Christmas!
RM
Mo Mo Mo(vember). It's Magic
Please note: This piece does not refer to either Mo Farah or Mo Sissoko. Hope you're not disappointed.
No, it refers of course to Movember. A noble gesture by a couple of Aussie oddballs that has become a global phenomenon, Movember is (for those uninitiated with it) when men proudly grow their facial hair for the entire month of November in order to raise awareness for prostate cancer charities. A worthy cause first and foremost, it is also a chance to appreciate of the art of facial hair.
Why is this appearing on sports blog I hear you cry? Well, Movember runs parallel to several sporting events and so sportsmen have taken it upon themselves to get involved. This means we are all exposed to a lot of moustaches and beards. Some good, some...well, it's the thought that counts!
I think the sight of normally clean shaven sensible men running around and tackling each other with a full handlebar moustache on their face enlivens sport. And so, at the cost of painful amounts of time, I have scoured my sources to provide you with a pictorial illustration of some of Movember's finest. Ladies, enjoy:
(Who am I kidding. There aren't any ladies. There never will be)
The most keen participants in Movember are undoubtedly rugby players. All the sides playing in the Autumn Internationals had a hairy vibe to them this year. Except New Zealand, who I assume don't take part due to the tradition being of Aussie origin. No-fun twats.
First, we'll get the Welsh out of the way. I was particularly impressed by Aled Brew (l), who went from no hair to full half beard in two weeks. The honours, however, go to young uncapped Toby Faletau (r) who pulled out the Will Smith tache and Afro combo that he briefly sported on Fresh Prince of Bel Air.
Note the gratuitous use of Print Screen and BBC I-Player in these pics. They have had to be cropped to avoid showing the world the Pixie Lott vids I was unashamedly watching (and listening to. That's the shameful part).
Moving on, we come to the South Africans. I liked them this year because they were really committed to their Mo's. Oh, and we beat them.
Gio Aplon (l) has made a frankly shit effort, but as I said earlier it's the thought that counts. Frans Steyn (r) is more impressive, sporting as he did an 18th century merchant seaman's tache and flowing locks.
Victor Matfield (l) usually sports a beard. This November, I felt it was looking particularly svelte. He is a truly brilliant man. Ryan Kankowski (r), my preferred South African 8 and particular favourite player, lived up to his nickname and grew perfect 'The Hoff' hair, which he accompanied with a Matfield beard, thus becoming super-cool.
Moving on to the Scots, the best efforts were by dynamo Openside John Barclay and attack coach Gregor Townsend.
Barclay, on the left, opted for an old British classic, the Soup-strainer. A favourite of 1960's refrigerator salesmen, Network Rail engineers and British paratroop Sergeants in World War Two. Townsend's tache looks a bit more new age.
A couple more rugby efforts bef
ore we move on.
This is Australian Hooker Tatafu Polota-Nau (l), and tonight Matthew he's going to be Lionel Richie. Cian Healy and Jamie Heaslip (r) meanwhile have heard that hot, young Robert Pattinson vampire types are getting all the girls. And so they decided to go Transylvanian. Fail.
This year saw the first real involvment of footballers in Movember.
No, it refers of course to Movember. A noble gesture by a couple of Aussie oddballs that has become a global phenomenon, Movember is (for those uninitiated with it) when men proudly grow their facial hair for the entire month of November in order to raise awareness for prostate cancer charities. A worthy cause first and foremost, it is also a chance to appreciate of the art of facial hair.
Why is this appearing on sports blog I hear you cry? Well, Movember runs parallel to several sporting events and so sportsmen have taken it upon themselves to get involved. This means we are all exposed to a lot of moustaches and beards. Some good, some...well, it's the thought that counts!
I think the sight of normally clean shaven sensible men running around and tackling each other with a full handlebar moustache on their face enlivens sport. And so, at the cost of painful amounts of time, I have scoured my sources to provide you with a pictorial illustration of some of Movember's finest. Ladies, enjoy:
(Who am I kidding. There aren't any ladies. There never will be)
The most keen participants in Movember are undoubtedly rugby players. All the sides playing in the Autumn Internationals had a hairy vibe to them this year. Except New Zealand, who I assume don't take part due to the tradition being of Aussie origin. No-fun twats.
First, we'll get the Welsh out of the way. I was particularly impressed by Aled Brew (l), who went from no hair to full half beard in two weeks. The honours, however, go to young uncapped Toby Faletau (r) who pulled out the Will Smith tache and Afro combo that he briefly sported on Fresh Prince of Bel Air.
Note the gratuitous use of Print Screen and BBC I-Player in these pics. They have had to be cropped to avoid showing the world the Pixie Lott vids I was unashamedly watching (and listening to. That's the shameful part).
Moving on, we come to the South Africans. I liked them this year because they were really committed to their Mo's. Oh, and we beat them.
Gio Aplon (l) has made a frankly shit effort, but as I said earlier it's the thought that counts. Frans Steyn (r) is more impressive, sporting as he did an 18th century merchant seaman's tache and flowing locks.
Victor Matfield (l) usually sports a beard. This November, I felt it was looking particularly svelte. He is a truly brilliant man. Ryan Kankowski (r), my preferred South African 8 and particular favourite player, lived up to his nickname and grew perfect 'The Hoff' hair, which he accompanied with a Matfield beard, thus becoming super-cool.
Moving on to the Scots, the best efforts were by dynamo Openside John Barclay and attack coach Gregor Townsend.
Barclay, on the left, opted for an old British classic, the Soup-strainer. A favourite of 1960's refrigerator salesmen, Network Rail engineers and British paratroop Sergeants in World War Two. Townsend's tache looks a bit more new age.
A couple more rugby efforts bef
ore we move on.
This is Australian Hooker Tatafu Polota-Nau (l), and tonight Matthew he's going to be Lionel Richie. Cian Healy and Jamie Heaslip (r) meanwhile have heard that hot, young Robert Pattinson vampire types are getting all the girls. And so they decided to go Transylvanian. Fail.
This year saw the first real involvment of footballers in Movember.
Apologies for the hotch-potch nature of the images. Sadly, it's a bit more difficult to nick images from Match of the Day 2. Evidently Stoke City got in on the act, with Jonathan Walters (l) and Robert Huth (r) being the best attempts. Walters looks like a cartoon Devil, and Huth is a Charlie Chaplin-Adolf Hitler combined lookalike. Best effort in my book goes to Birmingham's Keith Fahey (m), whose tache is half Graeme Souness homage, half veteran country postmaster.
So now, to close things out I must give my award for Best Movember Effort. The winner comes from a sport that I do not follow much, but features prominantly on this blog. You guessed it, cricket. Ryan told me to look up this person and his facial hair, and what I saw staggered me. So, ladies and gentlemen (no Graeme, remember: there are no ladies), I give you the best effort of this Movember: Kevin Pieterson of England (cough, South Africa, cough).
It is, quite frankly, fucking ridiculous. Well played sir. And now that November has passed, please shave the bloody thing off!
GM
Tuesday 30 November 2010
BBC Sports Personality 2010 - The BtC Lowdown
The BBC SPOTY has become very much an emotional award over the past few years, rewarding those who have given great service to their sport over a long period of time, rather than actually achieving individual greatness. The exception is of course during Olympic Years (Sir Chris Hoy, Kelly Holmes) but otherwise we are left with the likes of Ryan Giggs and Zara Phillips. Then there is the nomination of an emotionally drained Darren Clarke a couple of years back, as well as Andrew Flintoff's win back in 2005 - if he had performed beyond what he achieved in that Ashes series and England had still lost he wouldn't have been near the shortlist. So trivialised has it become that the shortlist was unveiled on The One Show by a grinning Matt Allwright, clearly delighted to be allowed off Channel Five for a change! It needs to get down to some serious sporting credentials. Which is where Beyond the Cliche's cold and cynical attitude comes into play:
Mark Cavendish - I'm not a cycling expert but I know that the peak of the sport is the Tour de France. Now, Cavendish managed to win five stages this year, which probably makes him the most successful British sprinter of all time. Did he win the green jersey? No. Close but no cigar - probably where he'll end up in SPOTY, although not many of the nominees can lay claim to being the best Brit ever in their sport. Mind you he's from the Isle of Man, who'll probably want independence some time soon. Did win the inferior Tour of Spain, probably a similar consolation to when England beat Bulgaria after the World Cup.
Tom Daley - a so-called ambassador for my hometown of Plymouth. My dad has even met him, saying he's a "lovely young man". However, the bully boys got to him at the fearsome Eggbuckland Commuinty College, so he moved to a private, "better" school in the area. Where I know the bullying is far worse, so good luck with that. Daley's 2010 featured injuries followed by 2 gold medals in the Commonwealth Games. Whilst it's an achievement to beat the Aussies, there's still no Chinese competition, so the field is not at it's strongest. Plus, no-one watched the Commonwealth Games, so he's likely to slip under the radar for the time being.
Jessica Ennis - look, I'll be watching SPOTY just to see how well Ennis scrubs up. It's just a pity that Victoria Pendleton's had a quiet year. And a relief that Rebecca Adlington has as well. Ennis won European gold in the heptathlon, a fair achievement when she was up against the Olympic champion. In fact, most good multi-discipline eventers are European, so Ennis' dominance of the sport recently is impressive. I would rate her highly, but to win SPOTY from athletics, you really have to be noticed. The European Champs are not that platform.
David Haye - boxers always do well at SPOTY, but to be honest, I can't help but be unimpressed with Haye's year. All he's done is mouth off a lot and then knock out two clearly inferior opponents to retain his WBA Heavyweight Title. Although we can all be thankful for the fact that he's taken Audley Harrison out of the public eye (STOP PRESS - Harrison is now saying he will continue fighting - moron!). Until he finally calls out a Klitschko and dispatches of them in the way that the Ukranian cloggers deserve (they take on weaker fighters than both Harrison and John Ruiz), he, to my mind, cannot be a contender. But he'll probably be in the Top 3.
AP McCoy - a clear early front-runner. Which is why I'm about to piss on that particular bonfire. Here stands the emotional choice of which I was talking in my introduction. Yes, he broke his 15-year duck in the Grand National on Don't Push It. Yes, he went past the 3000 winners mark. Congratulations and all that. BUT - there was nothing in particular about his 2010 as a whole that makes him more outstanding than the other nominees. You don't see every National winner nominated for SPOTY. You don't see Paul Hanagan, a jockey who came from nowhere to become the Champion, on this year's shortlist, despite his greater consistency this calendar year. Yet the great McCoy stands a great chance. He won't get my vote.
Graeme McDowall - Now here is a man who has had a great year, and certainly one of my Top 3. To come from seemingly nowhere to win the US Open at Pebble Beach and become the first Brit in 11 years to win a major is an achievement enough. To then back it up with the winning putt at No.12 in the Ryder Cup at Celtic Manor was a fairytale, particularly as it seemed like Europe were going to throw it away right at the very end as the USA clawed their deficit back. McDowall is now a Top 10 player and a star of the European Tour.
Graeme Swann - It's an ill-disguised fact that I love Swanny. He's made finger spin bowling fashionable and cool again. He's been part of the successful World T20 squad, England's first triumph in a global cricketing event. He's been the key man against Bangladesh and Pakistan this summer. He's now the No.2 Test bowler in the world and he's done it all with humility, a smile and an amusing Twitter account. The fact that two years ago he was nothing more than a jobbing county player makes his ascension all the more amazing. How he fares in SPOTY depends on how England go in the next 2 Ashes Tests before the ceremony. If they're leading, you can guarantee Swann will be Top 3.
Phil Taylor - Really? Yes, he's done really well but he's actually won everything before! 2010 was nothing special by The Power's standards, merely another good day at the office. And I'll shut this blog down if a darts player is ever considered enough of a "Sports Personality" to win the crown.
Lee Westwood - another star of the Ryder Cup, albeit one who I feel is less deserving of SPOTY than McDowall. Like Cavendish, Westwood has achieved great things and is now the man at the top of his sport, but when things have got really tough and really momentous, has fallen just short. Runners-up spots at the Open and the Masters will testify to that. He may also now be World No.1, a great achievement, but is mostly down to Tiger Woods' imploding personal life. Has also spent large chunks of the year injured.
Amy Williams - Ah, so it is an Olympic year after all. Therefore, she should be a shoe-in for SPOTY having won Team GB's first individual gold since Robin Cousins. Oh, it's the Winter Olympics. The point at which all but the upper-middle class switch off, and that's only because they once skiied at Whistler and can do the luge better than the entire nation of Georgia. This doesn't make Williams undeserving, it just means her chances in SPOTY are zero.
If I had it my way I would have a Top 3 of McDowall, Williams and Cavendish in that order. Dream on Ryan!
RM
Mark Cavendish - I'm not a cycling expert but I know that the peak of the sport is the Tour de France. Now, Cavendish managed to win five stages this year, which probably makes him the most successful British sprinter of all time. Did he win the green jersey? No. Close but no cigar - probably where he'll end up in SPOTY, although not many of the nominees can lay claim to being the best Brit ever in their sport. Mind you he's from the Isle of Man, who'll probably want independence some time soon. Did win the inferior Tour of Spain, probably a similar consolation to when England beat Bulgaria after the World Cup.
Tom Daley - a so-called ambassador for my hometown of Plymouth. My dad has even met him, saying he's a "lovely young man". However, the bully boys got to him at the fearsome Eggbuckland Commuinty College, so he moved to a private, "better" school in the area. Where I know the bullying is far worse, so good luck with that. Daley's 2010 featured injuries followed by 2 gold medals in the Commonwealth Games. Whilst it's an achievement to beat the Aussies, there's still no Chinese competition, so the field is not at it's strongest. Plus, no-one watched the Commonwealth Games, so he's likely to slip under the radar for the time being.
Jessica Ennis - look, I'll be watching SPOTY just to see how well Ennis scrubs up. It's just a pity that Victoria Pendleton's had a quiet year. And a relief that Rebecca Adlington has as well. Ennis won European gold in the heptathlon, a fair achievement when she was up against the Olympic champion. In fact, most good multi-discipline eventers are European, so Ennis' dominance of the sport recently is impressive. I would rate her highly, but to win SPOTY from athletics, you really have to be noticed. The European Champs are not that platform.
David Haye - boxers always do well at SPOTY, but to be honest, I can't help but be unimpressed with Haye's year. All he's done is mouth off a lot and then knock out two clearly inferior opponents to retain his WBA Heavyweight Title. Although we can all be thankful for the fact that he's taken Audley Harrison out of the public eye (STOP PRESS - Harrison is now saying he will continue fighting - moron!). Until he finally calls out a Klitschko and dispatches of them in the way that the Ukranian cloggers deserve (they take on weaker fighters than both Harrison and John Ruiz), he, to my mind, cannot be a contender. But he'll probably be in the Top 3.
AP McCoy - a clear early front-runner. Which is why I'm about to piss on that particular bonfire. Here stands the emotional choice of which I was talking in my introduction. Yes, he broke his 15-year duck in the Grand National on Don't Push It. Yes, he went past the 3000 winners mark. Congratulations and all that. BUT - there was nothing in particular about his 2010 as a whole that makes him more outstanding than the other nominees. You don't see every National winner nominated for SPOTY. You don't see Paul Hanagan, a jockey who came from nowhere to become the Champion, on this year's shortlist, despite his greater consistency this calendar year. Yet the great McCoy stands a great chance. He won't get my vote.
Graeme McDowall - Now here is a man who has had a great year, and certainly one of my Top 3. To come from seemingly nowhere to win the US Open at Pebble Beach and become the first Brit in 11 years to win a major is an achievement enough. To then back it up with the winning putt at No.12 in the Ryder Cup at Celtic Manor was a fairytale, particularly as it seemed like Europe were going to throw it away right at the very end as the USA clawed their deficit back. McDowall is now a Top 10 player and a star of the European Tour.
Graeme Swann - It's an ill-disguised fact that I love Swanny. He's made finger spin bowling fashionable and cool again. He's been part of the successful World T20 squad, England's first triumph in a global cricketing event. He's been the key man against Bangladesh and Pakistan this summer. He's now the No.2 Test bowler in the world and he's done it all with humility, a smile and an amusing Twitter account. The fact that two years ago he was nothing more than a jobbing county player makes his ascension all the more amazing. How he fares in SPOTY depends on how England go in the next 2 Ashes Tests before the ceremony. If they're leading, you can guarantee Swann will be Top 3.
Phil Taylor - Really? Yes, he's done really well but he's actually won everything before! 2010 was nothing special by The Power's standards, merely another good day at the office. And I'll shut this blog down if a darts player is ever considered enough of a "Sports Personality" to win the crown.
Lee Westwood - another star of the Ryder Cup, albeit one who I feel is less deserving of SPOTY than McDowall. Like Cavendish, Westwood has achieved great things and is now the man at the top of his sport, but when things have got really tough and really momentous, has fallen just short. Runners-up spots at the Open and the Masters will testify to that. He may also now be World No.1, a great achievement, but is mostly down to Tiger Woods' imploding personal life. Has also spent large chunks of the year injured.
Amy Williams - Ah, so it is an Olympic year after all. Therefore, she should be a shoe-in for SPOTY having won Team GB's first individual gold since Robin Cousins. Oh, it's the Winter Olympics. The point at which all but the upper-middle class switch off, and that's only because they once skiied at Whistler and can do the luge better than the entire nation of Georgia. This doesn't make Williams undeserving, it just means her chances in SPOTY are zero.
If I had it my way I would have a Top 3 of McDowall, Williams and Cavendish in that order. Dream on Ryan!
RM
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