Happy Anniversary (plus about a fortnight)

Time really does fly. Our flatmate said it wouldn't last six weeks. On the 25th March, Beyond the Cliche celebrated its' first birthday. The stories have changed, the sporting world is a different place, but the same wit and insight (or whatever they're calling what we do these days) remains the same. Obviously a post of this nature would have been slightly more appropriate on the actual day, but varying circumstances have prevented us from getting together before today. The beers have been bought in, so the tone of this may slide progressively into the bluntly obscene as things go on - see it as akin to the increasingly insulting hysteria of the Superbowl live blog.

So this is how we're going to do this - we are going to sit down and discuss our successes and failures as men. We will praise and criticise each other and well as ourselves on our excellent/shit/mediocre punditry (delete as applicable). It's a bit like those self-appraisals you have to always do at work. Only a little more interesting. We think. PS The Football League Show's on - forgive us if we get a little distracted...

RM: What do you reckon the most politically incorrect thing you've said during this year is? Like single it down to one. For me, I'm going to excuse myself making fun of Cecil Martin's disabled face because it was 2:30am. However accurate it may have turned out to be, describing all of Africa as being the home of the Civil Unrest World Cup may have touched a few nerves!

GM: Describing FIFA delegates as "whores on par with Aberdeen Sex Workers" was a reasonably offensive thing to say, as was suggesting that French people would prefer to fondle their genitals instead of doing anything constructive. Saying that "there are actually loads of black people in Scotland, you just can't see them in the dark of winter" was probably my most severe comment! I'm now afraid to enter a room unless the light is turned on. All of this stuff is obviously pretty shameful. Have you written anything that particularly shames you?

RM: Well first of all, we've always prided ourselves on saying what everyone else is thinking - so I'm not especially bothered about anything that could be construed as offensive or un-PC. I regret attempting to tackle the entire county season and Ashes tour in detail. It's actually really difficult to keep such a long process interesting to read without becoming formulaic. In that respect, I accurately captured how long and laborious both seasons were. It wasn't exactly a pleasure to write about towards the end. I'll keep in the international summer this year, and also follow the counties as a fan. But I won't be able to give it the same level of attention on here again!

GM: I'm personally pretty ashamed that I never actually finished my 'in-depth' World Cup Preview series, and that I attempted to ask Natalie Portman out in an article about Fernando Torres (she hasn't got back to me. Yet). I am in no way ashamed, though, of the number of articles I wrote while sitting in my boxers at the dead of night. And I make no apologies for rubbing it in on the rare occasion I predicted something correctly.

RM: What have you actually predicted correctly?

GM: For a start, I predicted that the blog would last for six weeks. It has obviously exceeded that figure... My World Cup predictions were generally pretty poor, but I at least recognised that Germany would be the most impressive nation there. I have pretty much got all of my club and international rugby predictions spot on, and need I remind you that I correctly got the exact Redskins record last year (6-10 baby)? AND I picked Andy Murray to lose on several occasions, so I'm practically Nostradamus.

RM: Germany were impressive, but they didn't actually win it did they? Who was it who accurately predicted the winner again? Oh yeh, that was me. I appreciate my NFL predictions were generally wide of the mark but I at least saw the end of Donovan McNabb in Philadelphia and called the Packers to win from the start of the season. Granted, it wasn't a tricky call to make, but it was the right one. Finally, I did that video piece on the T20 World Cup (not the actual Cricket World Cup, it gets complicated, keep up) - I said Suresh Raina could be India's player to watch. The next day he goes and scores a hundred. Oh and I said AP McCoy would win SPOTY but I take no pride in that as it was the obvious sentimental vote, as opposed to who actually deserved it (Mark Cavendish - again!)

GM: In the interest of self-improvement, I should probably highlight the less accurate predictions I made, which included a Germany-Brazil World Cup final (I picked it because it was a tad unconventional) and a tournament in which Italy and France would reach the Quarterfinals and Uruguay would be completely rubbish. To be honest, football hasn't been that kind to me; I said that Chelsea would win the league with Arsenal 2nd and Man United 3rd, and dismissed Blackpool as "being fucked" in 20th place. I also got the Superbowl wrong, but that was mainly for the sake of variety. Honest.

RM: Like I said, my NFL predictions were generally wildly inaccurate. This can be summed up by one team: The Kansas City Chiefs. I believe as described them as being "shit" and their QB Matt Cassel as being "useless". They ended up winning the AFC West (admittedly not too tricky), playing effectively both offensively and defensively and generally not being shit or useless. I also said Hampshire would win the County Championship. They didn't come close. At this point, I would like to extend a wholehearted apology to Pro-Bowler Cassel for writing him off. Any similar wrongs you need righted Graeme?

GM: I suppose I could give a grudging pat on the back to Scotland centre Nick De Luca for scoring the opening try in our only win of this year's Six Nations. But frankly, he got lucky. Nick, you're still shit. I may have been slightly harsh on Graeme Morrison, Kenny Dalgleish, the nation of Ireland and horses. Don't consider this an apology for what I said; it is simply highlighting that sometimes I can be a little mean.

RM: I suppose I should mention how harsh I was to the Welsh nation in the Six Nations live blog as well. However, I take none of it back as I still hate the leek-munching bastards. While we're on that subject, I feel I jumped the gun a touch on praising the job Andy Robinson has done with the Scottish side, particularly the gloating that he's the coach England wished they had. Martin Johnson's not done too badly since whilst our win in Argentina proved to be a false dawn. I still rate Robbo as a coach, I really do, but he's not a miracle worker - it would take an absolute genius to overhaul the SRU and make us genuinely competetive in the Six Nations. He is not that. Anyone else you overpraised?

GM: Nicolas Anelka for one, but I did qualify it by stating that he is a petulent, slovenly genius. Roy Hodgson may have gotten favourable treatment from me after his Liverpool dismissal, but his current great work at West Brom seems to support my original views that the Liverpool players were mainly to blame. I also perhaps praise Scotland openside John Barclay too much, but if I don't then who will? The same goes with Detroit WR Calvin Johnson. I am proud of my ongoing support of his career. As we draw our happy Frank Keating-esque whimsy article to a close, can you think of any piece of work you are most proud of?

RM: There are two, both of which I feel reflect the two different sides to the writing style of BtC. First of all, we have the piece I wrote on Darrelle Revis' holdout - applying the obsession that sportsmen have with money not just to the NFL, but to football, cricket and rugby. To my mind, the most complete piece I've written. On the lighter side of things, the "Top 10 Ways to Beat the Big Freeze" article was a) very topical and amusing and b) wholly insulting to so many people, especially yourself. In terms of your best work in my opinion - schools athletics. Personal experience used to reflect the sad state of British athletics. Top stuff.

GM: That was a piece from way back wasn't it? I had almost forgotten about it. In general, I have really enjoyed getting the chance to write things like that; a mix of analysis and personal opinion. French rugby, football managerial changes and some of the more serious ways that sport and society interact have all provided the basis for my most passionate articles. I'd like to think I did them justice, and didn't sound too pretentious. In terms of sheer lightheartedness, my best work has definately been the NFL related puns I came up with at 3 am in the 14th January edition of the Redzone.

Well there you go - one year down, maybe many more to come. Keep reading (if you actually do read this, please follow so that our self-esteem rises - 6 followers is pretty pish to be honest!). Cheers!

RM and GM